Sent!

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jah400
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Joined: 01/27/2014 - 16:08
Sent!

Just sent an email to 2 people (one in particular) who betrayed me deeply months ago.   I took this course to learn how to forgive him and to discover why I was holding on to the pain so stubbornly.  Last night's session was particularly helpful, especially the concept of "Ubunto."  I finally realized that what I really wanted was his forgiveness for anything I may have said or done that caused him so much pain that his only recourse was to cut me from his universe.  Perhaps I triggered pain and he cannot respond any other way than how  he did?  I just hit "send."  Now, finally I can take a nap.  Thank you Rabbi Rami, Randy, and the class.  

Rabbi Rami
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Ubuntu

Very brave. Since you posted this I assume you are open to a response. Let me simply offer that you may have had nothing to do with this person's betrayal of you. I am very close friends with a guy who betrayed me deeply decades ago. I hae never forgotten, but I never ended the friendship. If anything it has grown. What saved the friendship was my coming to know him better, and to see that I was collateral damage in a much larger drama that he was living. We talk more about this on Wednesday, but it is good to keep in mind that you may not be the target or the cause. Forgiving another doesn't necessarily mean taking responsibility for the other's actions or imagining that you caused those actions. 

jah400
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Thank you

Thank you Rabbi Rami!  Your response brings me a lot of peace.  And writing the email yesterday gave me the courage to write a love letter - including asking forgiveness - to my mother as part of her Valentine.  Wishing you and everyone a very happy Valentine's Day too!

new489
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The next few years were
The next few years were devoted to understanding, integrating, and deepening that transformation.192.168.1.100
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