{"id":19856,"date":"2023-01-10T16:59:39","date_gmt":"2023-01-10T23:59:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/resources2.soundstrue.com\/?p=19856"},"modified":"2023-01-11T13:35:44","modified_gmt":"2023-01-11T20:35:44","slug":"healing-the-trauma-that-you-dont-know-you-have","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/resources2.soundstrue.com\/blog\/healing-the-trauma-that-you-dont-know-you-have\/","title":{"rendered":"Healing the Trauma that You Don\u2019t Know You Have"},"content":{"rendered":"

Most people living today are more traumatized than they know. But how could that be?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

When we experience very distressing events, our nervous system goes into a state of overwhelm (or what neuroscientists call <\/span>dysregulation<\/span><\/i>). You may end up feeling less like yourself, unable to have a healthy range of experiences, but can\u2019t easily connect the dots mentally or heal emotionally. It\u2019s not your fault that this happens\u2014it\u2019s your nervous system\u2019s built-in way of protecting you, and it happens outside your conscious awareness.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

However, you can learn to recognize the effects of trauma. You can follow those threads through the maze of your past, to find ways of healing in the present that will improve your health mentally and emotionally.<\/span><\/p>\n

Types of Trauma<\/span><\/h2>\n

While individuals differ in their responses, there are broad categories of trauma that we should all know exist: childhood trauma, racial trauma, sexual trauma, religious trauma, narcissistic abuse, war, pandemics and other natural disasters, and intergenerational trauma. Three of these types are briefly covered below.<\/span><\/p>\n

Childhood Trauma<\/span><\/h3>\n

No family is perfect, but some do active harm. Too often, children suffer neglect and physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, often with no outside resources to protect them. Childhood trauma can also happen if the mother is treated violently, someone in the family has substance abuse problems or a mental illness, the parents are going through a divorce or separation, or one of the parents or a sibling dies.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In all of these situations, because a child\u2019s nervous system is not yet fully developed, the childhood trauma often goes unidentified until something triggers a memory or compounds it, years or decades later.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Narcissistic Abuse<\/span><\/h3>\n

Many of us know someone who exhibits signs of narcissism, focusing exclusively on themselves and unable to empathize with or \u201cmake room for\u201d others. If you\u2019ve suffered abuse by a narcissist, whether they were a parent, partner, or boss, you may no longer trust your instincts in relationships or feel guilty about things that aren\u2019t actually your fault or responsibility. You may feel you have to be \u201cspecial\u201d to gain recognition, and you may have developed a case of perfectionism to keep away the shame that your abuser made you feel for not living up to their impossible standard.<\/span><\/p>\n

Global Events: Pandemic Trauma and War Trauma<\/span><\/h3>\n

The pandemic put virtually all of us into a \u201csustained survival mode\u201d that evoked or caused trauma. The pandemic saw a 25 percent increase in anxiety and depression, according to the World Health Organization (WHO). As a shared trauma, it also led to widespread Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and burnout among health-care workers. It affected parents who had to juggle supervising their children and working from home while schools were closed. And it deeply impacted those who experienced the loss of a loved one unexpectedly to COVID, who were often not able to say goodbye in person, weaving trauma into the fabric of their grief.<\/span><\/p>\n

The first formally identified cases of PTSD (known as \u201cshell-shock\u201d) were in soldiers who served during World War I. Tragically, wars have been embedded into the human experience since recorded history. No matter whether it be the recent conflict in the Ukraine, the uprising in Iran, or ongoing conflicts elsewhere, the impact on the psyche of those living in those areas is severe. As widespread violence and threats of violence go on, month after month, traumatic stress compounds for both soldiers and civilians living in warzones. Even in areas where conflict is not directly taking place, there can be trauma impressed into those living in ongoing fear of nuclear war or attack.<\/span><\/p>\n

How Trauma Works in the Nervous System<\/span><\/h2>\n

To understand your trauma, you\u2019ll need to get to know your nervous system and how it responds to signals of danger, real or perceived.<\/span><\/p>\n

Over the course of human evolution, our nervous system developed three kinds of responses to threats to help us get through dangerous experiences intact. These subsystems are known as: social engagement, sympathetic mobilization, and parasympathetic immobilization<\/span> systems. They usually operate below our conscious awareness, but when someone experiences ongoing distress or a trauma that doesn\u2019t resolve, the neurological connections behind these responses get strengthened and we become \u201cstuck\u201d in maladaptive patterns\u2014through no fault of our own.<\/span><\/p>\n

When the social engagement system responds, we look for help or someone to rescue us from the situation. If this response is encouraged, we may habitually \u201cfawn\u201d around others, hoping to appease anyone causing us distress. We can develop too much compassion for others, leading us to forget to care for ourselves, which over time creates more stress and trauma in our nervous system.<\/span><\/p>\n

When the sympathetic nervous system responds, we engage in \u201cfight, flight, or freeze,\u201d to try to figure out what to do with the threat (freeze), then to subdue it (fight), or else escape it (flight). When this system is \u201cstuck\u201d in overdrive, we may have problems like depression, anxiety, or phobias.<\/span><\/p>\n

If all other tactics fail, the parasympathetic nervous system can still put us into a collapsed, shut-down state (\u201cfaint\u201d), as a way to survive with the least possible amount of damage when fighting or fleeing aren\u2019t possible. This state is linked to depression and dissociation.<\/span><\/p>\n

Symptoms of Trauma and PTSD<\/span><\/h2>\n

If you\u2019ve sustained any form of trauma in the past, you may experience various difficulties, depending on the way the trauma got stuck in your system:<\/span><\/p>\n