{"id":6287,"date":"2017-11-26T08:00:40","date_gmt":"2017-11-26T15:00:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/manyvoices.soundstrue.com\/?p=3523"},"modified":"2020-04-07T18:03:33","modified_gmt":"2020-04-07T18:03:33","slug":"recognizing-blind-spots","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/resources2.soundstrue.com\/blog\/recognizing-blind-spots\/","title":{"rendered":"Recognizing Your Blind Spots"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/p>\n

Blind spots, by nature, aren\u2019t seen by you, and cause you to behave unconsciously in ways that have impact on yourself, others, and the world around you. Blind spots are not areas you are familiar with that you are \u2018working on\u2019 – qualities you are developing – for example, trying to be more patient with your kids or more loving with your partner. Those qualities may be related to blind spots, but that is not what I\u2019m addressing here. Blind spots are literally what you DON\u2019T see about yourself.<\/p>\n

Have you ever had trouble taking in some piece of information – in a talk or a book you\u2019re reading, or sitting on your therapist’s couch? Usually it\u2019s a seemingly innocuous and simple piece of information, but you just can\u2019t get it, or hear it. It\u2019s like you\u2019re going fuzzy. That is a good indication of a blind spot trying to come into the light.<\/p>\n

Or perhaps even worse, you keep getting the same feedback from your partner, your coworkers, and even the generalized world around you keeps holding up the same mirror. But it doesn\u2019t quite make sense. You actually can\u2019t really hear or see it. Or even if it makes sense intellectually, it just doesn\u2019t seem necessarily relevant or important enough to demand your attention. Even though you\u2019re hearing the information with your two ears, it flies right past you in terms of actually sticking in your brain, your being, your heart. It actually does not compute. Another signal that it may be a blind spot!<\/p>\n

What we tend to end up with as we become adults is an imbalanced view of ourselves that plays handily into the creation and maintenance of our blind spots. What if you saw this mechanism at play, and then saw the pain and suffering you add on top of it? We usually do this in two ways: by personalizing it all and making ourselves either too big for our britches or conversely, unworthy of love and care. This is what I mean by an \u2018imbalanced\u2019 self view: too big or too small, over-amazing or under-good-enough. What if you had the courage and humility it would take to admit and embrace your actual place in the world? Even if that means it\u2019s an amazing place in the world? It doesn\u2019t have to be small and hidden just because we are humble and aware. But we are at home.<\/p>\n

This is what I mean by learning how to live an undefended life. We aren\u2019t propping up a flimsy ideal of who we think we should or shouldn\u2019t be, or who we think others want us to be. We just are who we are, at home in our own skin, blemishes and all. And we inhabit ourselves so much so that our gifts fall out of us necessarily, rightfully, and with ease.<\/p>\n

What if being yourself isn\u2019t essentially about finding your voice, your true calling, your best self, your most significant offering to the world, but instead is about learning to become at home in the world – your world? Learning to become a simple, content, good human being. With no promises on the outcome. Just for the sake of it.<\/p>\n

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Looking for more great reads?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

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Excerpted from The Blind Spot Effect<\/em> by Kelly Boys.<\/p>\n

\"\"Kelly Boys directed the launch of Google\u2019s \u201cSearch Inside Yourself\u201d leadership training program for neuroscience-based emotional intelligence and mindfulness. She\u2019s taught war veterans, women in prison, cancer survivors, those with substance abuse addictions, humanitarian workers, and psychotherapists. She lives in Boulder, Colorado. More at kellyboys.org.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Blind spots, by nature, aren\u2019t seen by you, and cause you to behave unconsciously in ways that have impact on yourself, others, and the world around you. 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