{"id":19701,"date":"2022-07-15T12:18:04","date_gmt":"2022-07-15T18:18:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/resources2.soundstrue.com\/?post_type=transcript&p=19701"},"modified":"2022-07-15T12:18:04","modified_gmt":"2022-07-15T18:18:04","slug":"decoding-your-emotional-blueprint","status":"publish","type":"transcript","link":"https:\/\/resources2.soundstrue.com\/transcript\/decoding-your-emotional-blueprint\/","title":{"rendered":"Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"image_print\"Print Transcript<\/span><\/a><\/div>

Tami Simon:<\/b> Welcome to <\/span>Insights at the Edge<\/span><\/i>, produced by Sounds True. My name\u2019s Tami Simon. I\u2019m the founder of Sounds True. I\u2019d love to take a moment to introduce you to the Sounds True Foundation. The goal of the Sounds True Foundation is to provide access and eliminate financial barriers to transformational education and resources, such as teachings and trainings on mindfulness, emotional awareness, and self-compassion. If you\u2019d like to learn more and join with us in our efforts, please visit SoundsTrueFoundation.org.<\/span><\/p>\n

In this episode of <\/span>Insights at the Edge<\/span><\/i>, my guest is Judy Wilkins-Smith. Judy is a highly regarded organizational, individual, and family patterns expert. She combines a systems-based approach with constellation work to coach high-performing individuals, organizations, and families to end limiting cycles and reframe challenges into lasting breakthroughs and peak performance. With Sounds True, Judy Wilkins-Smith is the author of a new book. It\u2019s called <\/span>Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint: A Powerful Guide to Transformation Through Disentangling Multigenerational Patterns<\/span><\/i>.<\/span><\/p>\n

I loved talking to Judy. Quite honestly, I found her to be one of the most unconditionally empowering people I\u2019ve ever met. Her work helps us transform some of the most entrenched patterning that we have, the patterns we\u2019ve inherited from our family lineages, such that we choose to evolve and we gift our ancestors with our evolutionary expression. Here\u2019s my conversation with Judy Wilkins-Smith.<\/span><\/p>\n

Judy, by way of introduction, can you share with our listeners a bit about your background and how you came to be doing constellation work and systems-based work in working with individuals?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Judy Wilkins-Smith:<\/b> Sure. I\u2019m originally from South Africa, moved over to the US, and we\u2019d been here for a short while when my father was killed. It was a case of \u201ceither write books or go crazy,\u201d and I decided that it was probably better to write books. So, I started writing fiction, and into, I think it was about the third book, I was looking for a piece of information and stumbled upon this person who was already doing systemic work and constellations. He said, \u201cCome study my work and I\u2019ll help you with your book.\u201d So, I went and studied his work and got zero help with the book, but that was the journey that began it. I think once I picked it up, I realized it was something that I\u2019d probably been speaking for a long time but not had a language for, and this gave it that language.<\/span><\/p>\n

I think I\u2019d always known that there was more to us and our history than we were aware of, and that there were a lot of secrets, or mysteries, or possibilities contained in that. So, if we have a look, though, somebody said to me, about halfway through my studying, \u201cYou know what? Of course, you\u2019d know this.\u201d And I said, \u201cWhy \u2018of course\u2019?\u201d And they said, \u201cBecause it began in South Africa with the Zulu tribe. Hellinger went down there to go and tame the Zulus, and they tamed him instead. He realized, quite early in, that any time they had a problem, they would go and explore their ancestry to see what was happening.\u201d The strange thing was, I came from the healthcare arena, and when I left that position, the person who gave my farewell was a Zulu gentleman. He said, \u201cYou may be leaving us, but you\u2019ll find a way to represent us in the world.\u201d I laughed and I said, \u201cYou\u2019re right.\u201d And now I do it every day.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Now, you referenced Bert Hellinger who\u2019s credited with being the person who formed, who founded constellation work. For people who are hearing about this for the first time, and they\u2019re like, \u201cWhat is constellation work? What is a systems-based approach to transformation,\u201d give us an orientation.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. I\u2019m going to use three terms: your systemic work, your constellations, and your mind, which is emotional DNA, which is bit of a build-out.<\/span><\/p>\n

Systemic work is the study of you within a system. You didn\u2019t happen in a vacuum. Who you are came from thousands of years of all sorts of experiences, behaviors, thoughts, feelings, actions that have accumulated and been passed down to you. You don\u2019t just inherit your physical DNA, you inherit your emotional DNA. That\u2019s what I call emotional DNA. Your patterns of thoughts, feelings, and actions that you\u2019ve inherited. It\u2019s a study of you within a system and your emotional DNA, and the breakthrough approach that we use is constellations.<\/span><\/p>\n

Thanks, Bert Hellinger, for the term because everybody says, \u201cOh, are you an astrologist?\u201d No. In this work, a constellation is a grouping of elements within a home system. Your family system is your mother, your father, your sister, your brother, your grandparents, somebody who may have influenced you dramatically, those all belong in the family system. And when we can show you by taking your inner picture of how that looks, what it looks like in front of you, we choose representatives to represent each one of those elements, like mom, like dad, like sister, like brother. Then I will ask the client to place them for me the way that it is for them in relationship to each other. We might find mom and dad are close together, brother and sister are far apart, or mother\u2019s off in the distance and dad is close to the children.<\/span><\/p>\n

By just seeing that picture, we\u2019re engaging multiple senses. It\u2019s vision, sound, touch, taste, smell. Now, you\u2019re having a multi-sensorial experience of your system. And as I ask questions more and more of the history services until you\u2019re seeing the issue, its origins, its effects, what pattern wants to stop and what pattern is trying to start through you? Because it\u2019s multi-sensorial, you have that embodied experience which begins to rewire thoughts, feelings, and actions in the moment. So, often, what we will hear is, \u201cHow come I\u2019ve been somewhere for 20 years to try and resolve this, and it\u2019s resolved in an hour and a half?\u201d It\u2019s because you have that total sensation and the total experience that just goes boom and starts to rewire. That\u2019s the constellation.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>I\u2019ve seen constellation work done, and maybe some of our listeners have, as well, at events, where they\u2019ll bring someone onto the stage, that person will then choose someone to be their mother, father, grandmother, grandfather, et cetera. But what I was introduced to in your book <\/span>Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint<\/span><\/i> is how we could use constellation work on our own at our home with a bunch of post-it notes. And I thought, \u201cReally? Does that really work?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Yes, it really works. And the reason I did that was because for a long time, there\u2019s been a lot of mystery around constellations. People think that it\u2019s only others who kind of float two inches above the ground, who can do these things, and \u201cOnce I get home, I don\u2019t know what I\u2019m doing.\u201d So, the whole aim of the book was to demystify that and to give you a very powerful transformational piece of your own. And yes, it works. I work like this with CFOs, CEOs, top executives around the world, and everyday people.<\/span><\/p>\n

The minute you put down a post-it or a piece of computer paper and you put a little arrow on it that gives you direction, you\u2019re creating a directional marker or representative. And we know, from studies, that as human beings, we\u2019re well able to transfer our emotions, our thoughts, and our feelings onto inanimate objects. So, very quickly, you start to make the invisible visible and the unconscious conscious, and now it\u2019s popping for you. And when you learn to do that, you start to see what you couldn\u2019t put together before and you can unravel complex issues for yourself that way.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Yes. I\u2019m wanting our listeners to be able to leave this conversation with enough knowledge and information that they can build a constellation themselves with something they\u2019re working with. What do you think about that? Is that a good goal?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>I think that\u2019s perfect.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. So, we\u2019re going to work towards that together here, Judy. To give a little bit more background, in the very beginning of <\/span>Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint<\/span><\/i>, I was kind of stunned by this. You described how it\u2019s possible that in your life you could be expressing something that was a pain, or a trauma, or an exclusion from someone in your family system generations before you. And I was like, \u201cReally?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Yep.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>I want to understand that more.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. We know in systemic work and in systems\u2014this is one of the basic tenets of the work\u2014everybody belongs, everybody has a right to belong. If anybody\u2019s right to belong is excluded for any reason whatsoever, that person or that issue is going to echo through the generations, seeking its place, wanting to be included, and it will seek resolution through later generations. What it does is, it transfers that thought, feeling, action, just keeps echoing down through the generations. But also, the details of the event begin to fade, but the symptoms get louder and louder and louder until somebody says, \u201cStop. Enough. We can\u2019t do this anymore,\u201d or \u201cI can\u2019t do this anymore.\u201d And then, you begin to look, and you ask questions like, \u201cWell, who else in the family was excluded? Who else was ill in the way that you were? Who else struggled in the ways that you do?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When we look, we see, as you go back, you\u2019ll find the original. When you\u2019ve got the originator, what happens is there\u2019s an event. The event creates a reaction. The reaction creates thoughts, feelings, actions. Those keep on getting passed down to the next generation and the next generation in all sorts of ways. Epigenetically is one way, and then in our sayings and systemic sentences, \u201cBe careful. Don\u2019t do that,\u201d \u201cPeople who have money are greedy,\u201d \u201cWatch out. You shouldn\u2019t do that. It\u2019s going to hurt you.\u201d So we inherit those patterns of behavior or the patterns of language, until somebody says, \u201cReally? Does it have to be that way,\u201d and we go, \u201cOh, well, let\u2019s look.\u201d So, we have a look and we begin to re-engineer what we\u2019ve inherited as the truth\u2014because it\u2019s not the truth, it\u2019s just your truth or your ancestors\u2019 truth, and you can change that anytime you want to. And that is the purpose of that pattern that keeps echoing down through the generations. It comes down until it\u2019s given its place, seen and resolved, and you can move on.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>There\u2019s this quote from the book, you write, \u201cEverything in our lives is geared to bring imbalance to our awareness so it can be corrected.\u201d I wonder if you can explain that in the context of what we\u2019re talking about, some imbalance from a previous generation, maybe give an example of that and how it\u2019s trying to be corrected now through my life, or your life, or someone\u2019s life that you\u2019ve worked with.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Right. Let\u2019s take an example of a client who comes to see me, and he says to me, \u201cYou know what? I\u2019ve got everything going for me. My life is great. Great job, great wife, great kids. But my wife\u2019s about to leave me because I drink like a fish. It started when I was about 35. I don\u2019t know what it\u2019s about. I can\u2019t stop.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

So I say to him, \u201cTell me about your dad.\u201d \u201cOh, well, dad was an alcoholic as quite a young man, always an alcoholic, and mom left him. So, you can already see we have a similarity.\u201d I say, \u201cTell me about Grandfather.\u201d He says, \u201cOh, well, Grandfather and Grandmother were really, really close. And then, Grandmother got pregnant, she has dad, she dies in childbirth. Grandpa was never the same again. He started drinking.\u201d Now we see that the way that the men connect is through the drinking.<\/span><\/p>\n

But there is another piece that\u2019s happening, too. Grandfather sees himself as a murderer. He made her pregnant, she died. Son sees himself as the cause of his mother\u2019s death. He\u2019s really frightened to get close to a woman in case he kills her. My client comes in and says, \u201cMy wife\u2019s about to leave. I drink like a fish. I don\u2019t want to get too close.\u201d Now we know why. And when we know why, we can go back and say, \u201cThat was Grandfather\u2019s. Can you see that? Can you see that carrying that neither honors him nor brings strength to your system? Can you leave that with him?\u201d Well, when he can leave that with him, he can look at his father as well and say, \u201cI get it. I understand why you were so afraid to get close to Mom.\u201d And then he can look at his wife and say, \u201cThat wasn\u2019t mine. I can look at you and I don\u2019t need to drink to join the men anymore. I can stay present, and I can see you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Balance has been achieved. What was excluded, which was grandmother, which was the childbirth, which was the drinking, is now brought back into balance, everything\u2019s given its place, and now we can do it differently.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>You introduced this phrase that really got my attention, \u201cunconscious loyalties,\u201d that we can have unconscious loyalties. In the example you just gave, maybe you could\u2014<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Exactly right.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: \u2014<\/b>illustrate this. Where was the loyalty in your client?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. The loyalty echoed through the men. Grandfather looks at Grandmother and says, \u201cI can\u2019t face this. I\u2019m going to drink,\u201d which, in systemic work, we know is often a slow death or dying to what you can\u2019t look at. Then, that passes to the son and the son goes, \u201cNot only am I responsible for my mom\u2019s death, but Dad, if you couldn\u2019t keep a wife, how dare I?\u201d Son says, \u201cDad, Granddad, if you couldn\u2019t keep a wife, I must lose mine, too,\u201d until he looks at that and goes, \u201cUh-uh. Something\u2019s got to be different because if I don\u2019t do this, my son is going to have the same problem.\u201d Often, they go, \u201cI don\u2019t want to pass that on to my children,\u201d but the real joy in that is what you are going to pass on to your children is new emotional DNA. So, when you do yours, they inherit something completely different.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>I\u2019m imagining that someone listening is starting to reflect on an unconscious loyalty they may have towards previous people in their family line. I think for myself about some unconscious loyalties that I have about how successful I could be or how much money I could make and, \u201cAm I really going to outdo all the people who came before me,\u201d and how uncomfortable that makes me feel. So, take me through the process of, first of all, what are some of the unconscious loyalties that seem common to you, that it\u2019s a repeating pattern, you see it a lot? And then, importantly, how do we work with it once we\u2019re like, \u201cOK, this is an unconscious loyalty that I have. I get it. It\u2019s ruling my life\u201d?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>I love the one that you brought. Yours is a perfect example. I see financial and success ones often. \u201cHow dare I do better than the ones who came before me? It\u2019s very uncomfortable. Who do I think I am to do that?\u201d There\u2019s a slightly different way for you to look at that. \u201cBecause of all of you, I get to stand on the shoulders of all of you who came and brought the pattern of maybe not succeeding, which ignited a passion in me to succeed. For all of you who couldn\u2019t, I can.\u201d All that you are doing is you are actually not stepping out of the system; you\u2019re stepping ahead of the system; you\u2019re stepping further into it. You\u2019re certainly not an imposter. You\u2019ve got enough ignition behind you to become the pioneer. You\u2019re stepping into that with gratitude and thanks to all the ones who came before you.<\/span><\/p>\n

Either they couldn\u2019t do it and you looked at that and went, \u201cI do not want that to be me,\u201d in which case, \u201cThanks to them,\u201d or, \u201cYou all built some success. It\u2019s time for me to take the big leap,\u201d in which case, \u201cThanks to them.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

I always say to people, \u201cYour success is always due to your parents, whether it\u2019s in collusion with or reaction to. What will you do? You will look at Mom, Dad, the ones who came before you, and go, \u2018I know you didn\u2019t get to, but look at what you created. I did. Because of you, me.\u2019\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

In fact, I have a client who\u2019s a rather lovely soul, a billionaire client who started with nothing, but he watched his father being belittled and he said, \u201cI will never allow myself to be in that position ever.\u201d And he worked like crazy to be able to get to where he is now. He\u2019s incredibly philanthropic, but his father, whenever he would go and visit him, Dad would kind of hide behind the kitchen table and not want talk. And he said to me, \u201cWhat\u2019s that about? Suddenly, I\u2019ve become successful, and he can\u2019t talk to me.\u201d I said, \u201cIt\u2019s not that he can\u2019t. It\u2019s that he\u2019s now wondering if he is good enough for this child. All you have to do is walk back into the room when you go and visit and say, \u2018Hey, Dad. There\u2019s something you need to know. Because of you, me.\u2019\u201d That\u2019s all he said, and Dad came up from behind the table, never went back behind the table because suddenly, he had his place in the system. Son hadn\u2019t gotten too big and Dad too small.<\/span><\/p>\n

When we look at the ones who come before us and recognize they were there to feed us and to give us the stepping stones, the very best gift we can give them is to step beyond what they\u2019ve created, because that is what the system is waiting for.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>It\u2019s interesting because when you think of going against whatever unconscious loyalty you might identify in your life that you\u2019re holding fast to, I think there\u2019s this idea, \u201cI don\u2019t want to step out of the system. I don\u2019t want to be exiled and not belong to my family,\u201d but you\u2019re describing something different, which is that,\u201cI can somehow be part of the growth, evolution, further expression, and be in my family system.\u201d So that\u2019s a really different way of looking at it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Absolutely. You belong whether we have different ways to belong. Some of the ways, most of the ways are we stagnate and repeat. But if you look at a flower, imagine if it thought it had to belong by never blooming. It can\u2019t do that. But it also can\u2019t bloom without its roots or the petals. It needs all of that for it to grow. But does it belong to the plant? Of course.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, all you are doing is you are taking that whole system another step forward. In fact, the minute you take the quantum leap, you\u2019re growing the entire system, the entire system is taking that leap. Think about somebody who struggles, they come from the project, everybody in the family struggles, they do something remarkable, and what\u2019s the first thing they do, Tami?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>They give back to their family?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Bingo. They turn around and they go, \u201cCome. Look what I found. Look what\u2019s happened. I want to share. Come.\u201d They know that they belong. And because they know that they belong, of course, they\u2019re inviting the system in, and of course, the system is going to then begin to grow in that direction. And suddenly, after generations of poverty, you see generations of success because they\u2019ve changed that unconscious loyalty. They\u2019ve not said, \u201cWe all suffer greatly,\u201d they\u2019ve begun to change that.<\/span><\/p>\n

In fact, I have a friend who is from a particular ethnicity, and they said to me, \u201cYou don\u2019t understand. Our group was born to suffer.\u201d I said, \u201cYep. And they\u2019re going to keep on if you keep on keeping on, too. Do you want to change that, or is it important to you that your tribe or your group, your ethnicity must suffer? If it is, you\u2019re doing the right thing. If it\u2019s not, maybe it\u2019s time to become bilingual and learn another language, too.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>I think this is some of the hardest work we can do, in our growth work we can do, which is, transforming these deep ancestral patterns. I\u2019d love to understand more from you why it\u2019s so hard. Why is it so hard for people?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>There\u2019s actually a really easy answer to that. In the book, I talk about \u201cboth\u201d language, or the \u201cfull\u201d language. We were born with a full language; we speak only half of that. We were raised to believe that \u201cYou should suffer. You should struggle. It is noble. It is worthy. You got to have the good fight. It\u2019s got to be negative before it gets positive.\u201d That\u2019s thousands of generations of that stuff. But the fact is we\u2019re also born with a language that says, \u201cYou can. You\u2019re incredible. You\u2019re possible. You\u2019re strong. You\u2019re capable. Of course, things can happen the right way,\u201d but we\u2019re not taught that, and we\u2019re not allowed that. So, now, we\u2019re stepping into a very different section of a meta pattern of \u201cthou shalt not,\u201d and we\u2019re going, \u201cBut why can\u2019t we?\u201d The minute you start going \u201cWhy can\u2019t we,\u201d things begin to change. That\u2019s why it\u2019s so hard. You\u2019re caught in the systemic trance of a meta pattern.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. I don\u2019t think I realized that. And you\u2019re saying this meta pattern came from our human survival focus. Is that what you\u2019re pointing to?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>I would say it comes from survival, it comes from culture, it comes from religion, it comes from ethnicity. Each system has its unspoken, and sometimes spoken, but very clear rules. Think about it. When we think about the wise ones who came to teach us, often, we focus on their suffering. We forget to focus on everything that they taught us, which was amazing, incredible. How many times did they say, \u201cYou could do more than I can,\u201d and we don\u2019t listen to that? Instead, we go, \u201cOh, it\u2019s awfully noble to suffer.\u201d It\u2019s not.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>This reminds me of a little section from the book where you write, \u201cIf you take only one thing from this book, I hope it\u2019s the realization that it\u2019s your destiny to want more, expect more, and be more, and that transformation begins with daring to believe it\u2019s possible and going for it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. So, let\u2019s talk to that person who says, \u201cI have an unconscious loyalty about X, Y, Z to my ancestral lineage. Yet, I want more, but I do feel like I will be betraying them. I heard Judy say, \u2018No, I\u2019m blooming. This is my gift to them. I\u2019m going further.\u2019 I hear that intellectually, but inside of me, I feel stuck.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. There are two things that I\u2019m going to address, if you can hold them both so I don\u2019t forget them. The one is, building the weight. So, we\u2019re going to have building the weight.<\/span><\/p>\n

The other one is this: We have been taught, and this comes, again, into some of our meta patterns, \u201cMy ancestors struggled. I dare not forget and I dare not outgrow them or get bigger. That would be disrespectful.\u201d I\u2019m going to ask, \u201cHow respectful it is to keep repeating the struggle versus becoming super successful and showing others how you and your group, your ancestry, are wise and capable? Which one do we want to do? Is it better if you struggle like they did?\u201d This is a question I ask every one of my clients, \u201cHow big are you willing to be,\u201d because the day that you say, \u201cYes, I\u2019m willing to be the biggest version of myself,\u201d it\u2019s the humblest day of your life. It is the first day that you agree to be responsible for growing the biggest version of your life, and it is the first day that you are truly in service of the universe and those around you.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Whoa, you\u2019re blowing my mind here. \u201cThis is the day of greatest humility, the day that I commit to being the most expanded version of myself.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Yes, because it\u2019s never just about you. The minute you expand you, your system cannot help but expand. It may take a while. It cannot help it. The minute you expand, you\u2019re never doing it just for you, ever.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. \u201cBuilding the weight,\u201d what is that about?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Building the weight. Here\u2019s the next piece. People go, \u201cOK, I heard you, I can do this,\u201d and then they go, \u201cWell, I tried, and it didn\u2019t work.\u201d Here\u2019s the deal. Until you commit with your whole being, and until it\u2019s so exciting that you can\u2019t stand yourself, the rest of your system\u2019s going to keep going, \u201cOh, Tami, don\u2019t do that. That\u2019s not nice. Come back here. Here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.\u201d Even though it wants you to move forward, it\u2019s going to keep pulling you back. So you have got to make your journey so exciting that you can\u2019t stand yourself, because the minute you do, and the minute you say a hundred percent yes, and you commit to the journey, all of the excuses will fade, all of the old reasons why you can\u2019t will fade, and you will go there. And you do this. Every single one of us has done this.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI want to go on vacation. It\u2019s a little bit of a stretch for my budget, but I\u2019m dying to go to The Bahamas\u201d \u201cWell, but you shouldn\u2019t do that.\u201d \u201cYeah, but no one in my family has been. I really want to go.\u201d \u201cYes, I know, but you know the budget and you know the\u2014\u201d \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m doing it,\u201d and you suddenly start to get this tingle. What you\u2019re doing is you are teaching yourself, \u201cI am quite capable of making the magic that\u2019s going to pull me all the way there.\u201d If you do it one time, you\u2019re going to feel so different that you will do it again and again, because you\u2019ve just unlocked Pandora\u2019s box, the positive side, and you\u2019ve suddenly discovered that life is an adventure, not something that was thrown at you. And by goodness, you\u2019re going to go after it and you are going to do all sorts of things you never expected.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Mm-hmm. Judy, give me an example from your personal life of working with some type of unconscious commitment you had to your family lineage and how you changed it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>How about giving money away? I understood from early on that you should give all your money away, or you should give money away. I can remember being at a Catholic school where it was, as we heard, \u201cmore blessed to give than to receive.\u201d But it was very odd for me that I would put money in the collection plate, and they wouldn\u2019t let me make change. And I kept thinking, \u201cOne of these days, I\u2019m going to need what\u2019s in that collection plate.\u201d So here I am, and people are talking about money and they\u2019re saying, \u201cMoney is not good. It\u2019s either love or money. It\u2019s either this or money.\u201d And then we moved over here, and it was really difficult. We hit a bottom, because we basically walked out with the clothes on our back. I can remember, it\u2019s actually in the book, going out for a walk and saying to God, \u201cOK, here I am, again. I need to talk to you. We need money,\u201d or \u201cWe\u2019re struggling. Would you mind if I spoke to money?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

And I sort of walked a bit and I didn\u2019t get smacked, but I did hear a bit of a giggle and I thought, \u201cWell, OK, here we go.\u201d And I had long conversation with money and I think I cried as much as I laughed when I realized that as a kid, with little canna seeds\u2014I collected those from plants to give to my mom, because if she planted those, I already figured out she could get more and more and more because they\u2019d make more and more seeds. I\u2019d loved money or the trade of it, from a small child, but I\u2019d been taught that money wasn\u2019t nice and wasn\u2019t good. And the more I began to talk to money, the more I realized it was a very deep friend, and a very wise soul, and an incredible teacher and mentor. And of course, it wanted to come play with me, but I kept pushing it away.<\/span><\/p>\n

In fact, I was so good at pushing it away. I went to a casino. My mother-in-law took us. So, she takes us to a casino. We really could have done with some of the money, we were newish family. I walk in, and I\u2019m holding her coins and I\u2019m holding my coins. I put three coins into the machine, and I hit a jackpot. I went, \u201cWow, here\u2019s this jackpot.\u201d And then I realized I\u2019d taken the coins from hers. Now, any sane being would\u2019ve said, \u201cOh, I\u2019m sorry,\u201d taken the three coins and put it back, \u201cNot me.\u201d In our family, there was also, \u201cYou must be impeccably honest.\u201d So I went over to her and I said to her, \u201cI used your coins and I hit a jackpot. Here it is.\u201d And she took it. I mean, money was throwing itself at me and I was going, \u201cNo, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is not good.\u201d On the way back from that money walk, I picked up a $1, a $5, a $10, a $20, a $50, and a $100.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>What do you mean you picked them up? They were floating on the street?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>They were on the ground. People were walking over them.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>This part\u2019s hard for me to believe, Judy.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>I\u2019m sure it is. It was hard for me to believe.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>I picked up every one of those denominations and I made a promise to money that I would teach that it was wise and kind that people inherited that DNA of \u201cyou shall not love me,\u201d and that I would show them how money was a good mentor and a great friend. So that was an unconscious loyalty for me and a deep one.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. Let\u2019s say, at this point, someone\u2019s identified an unconscious loyalty in their life, and they want to use this constellation approach to work through it. Can we do that?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>We can absolutely do that.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Let\u2019s do it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. Do you want to give me one?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Let\u2019s see.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Or do you want me to take a generic one for you?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Take one that you\u2019ve worked with that you see come up a lot for people.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. One thing I see quite often is one where people say, \u201cI don\u2019t belong. I can\u2019t belong in my family. Don\u2019t know how to belong. Everybody\u2019s different.\u201d And I say to them, \u201cLet\u2019s go and have a look. Why is that so? What are you talking about when you say, \u2018I don\u2019t belong\u2019? Let\u2019s see what\u2019s going on.\u201d So I ask them to write down on a piece of paper, \u201cMom\u201d on one, \u201cDad\u201d on one, maybe \u201cSister\u201d on one, \u201cBrother\u201d on one, and one for themselves. And at the top of each one, I ask them to put an arrow. Now, you\u2019ve got a nice little directional post-it note. And then I ask them to just hold it in their hands and to not think about it, but this time, to tune into the heart and the gut. We use our heads a lot and it gets us far, but you want to align the head, heart, and gut. So, you\u2019re going to use the heart and the gut, too. \u201cThe way that it is for you when you say, \u2018I don\u2019t belong,\u2019 how do you feel? That\u2019s your heart. What does it feel like in your gut? Does it tense up? I want you to now take those pieces of paper and place them in relationship to each on the floor the way that it is for you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Now, they lay those out on the floor, and then I take a look and I go, \u201cHmm. That\u2019s interesting. You don\u2019t feel like you belong? You\u2019re the eldest daughter.\u201d \u201cYeah.\u201d \u201cWhat\u2019s Mom doing over there in the distance? She\u2019s way at the edge.\u201d \u201cShe\u2019s been gone since I was little. She doesn\u2019t even see me.\u201d \u201cWhat happened? Are there\u201d\u2014so here\u2019s a question I\u2019ll often ask\u2014\u201cany miscarriages, stillbirths? Are there any children who didn\u2019t make it? Was there a tragedy in the family that took Mom\u2019s attention away?\u201d \u201cWell, she lost a child before me.\u201d \u201cSo you\u2019re not the eldest.\u201d \u201cYes, I\u2019m the eldest.\u201d \u201cNo, you\u2019re not the eldest.\u201d That\u2019s often the first \u201cWhoops. OK, hold on.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDo you understand that when you can\u2019t find your place, that\u2019s because you\u2019re trying to stand in the place of an eldest when you\u2019re not. How about we put down a representative for that one who didn\u2019t make it?\u201d So, they\u2019ll put down a representative, and sometimes, if I\u2019ve got live representatives, you may see the mom sit down on the floor and look up at the daughter or look down at the one they lost. And immediately, the person will say to me, \u201cOh, you mean it\u2019s not about me? It\u2019s not my fault that Mom didn\u2019t see me?\u201d \u201cNo, not your fault.\u201d \u201cHere\u2019s where Mom\u2019s attention was\u2014do you get that?\u201d \u201cYeah, because she was so often sad, and she was so often absent.\u201d \u201cSo, who were you closer to?\u201d \u201cWell, Dad.\u201d \u201cDo you understand why? He allowed you to be a child and have your place, but with Mom, not so much. What about your siblings?\u201d \u201cThey don\u2019t always know where they belong either.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It becomes pretty simple. What I\u2019ll do is I\u2019ll say \u201cWe know Mom is stuck somewhere. We could explore that, but your issue is \u2018I don\u2019t know how to belong.\u2019 So we\u2019re going to show you.\u201d And then I\u2019ll say to them, \u201cStarting from left to right, can you put Dad on the left, and then Mom, and then the one who didn\u2019t make it, and then yours, your representative, and then perhaps your brother and your sister in their order? I\u2019m going to ask you to go and stand in the place of the one who didn\u2019t make it, and they\u2019ll go, \u201cYeah, this doesn\u2019t feel good. Yeah, but this is how I feel good.\u201d \u201cGood. Now, stand in your place. You\u2019re a second child, not a first. What\u2019s that feel like?\u201d \u201cThat\u2019s my place.\u201d And you can see the face lights up, all the tears start, and they get this embodied sensation, or there are goosebumps. And I say, \u201cWhat does that feel like?\u201d \u201cHere\u2019s where I belong.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s those simple pieces. It sounds simple. It\u2019s when you stand in it, and you experience it, and you see it, that you go, \u201cOh.\u201d And then I\u2019ll say to them, \u201cAnd let\u2019s talk about Mom. Do you understand why she didn\u2019t see you?\u201d \u201cI got it.\u201d \u201cDo you understand it was never about you?\u201d \u201cYeah.\u201d \u201cHow\u2019s that feel?\u201d \u201cI\u2019m not so sad anymore. I get it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

There\u2019s a whole lot that\u2019s happening in that one simple process. \u201cWhat is it like for you to stand in your place and be the smaller one?\u201d \u201cFeels good.\u201d Now, they don\u2019t have the weight that they\u2019re trying to carry, which wasn\u2019t theirs. They\u2019re not trying to take care of Mom and be seen. They get it. And now, they can breathe.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>As you\u2019re talking, it seems to me like it would be better even than pieces of paper if I had little clay figures or something like that that I could play with all my family members with.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Absolutely. And I do. Little Lego figures. They\u2019ve got those, and they\u2019re perfect.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Right.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Yes. Because then you can see which way they\u2019re facing. When you put it out, you can literally, with the figures, you can see who\u2019s engaged, who\u2019s not, who\u2019s close, who\u2019s distant, where are their obstacles, where are their opportunities. It\u2019s simply because we\u2019re 3D-ing it. And when we stand in it, we\u2019re 3D-ing it and we\u2019re bringing that whole experience into ourselves. So we\u2019re just employing new senses that we typically don\u2019t when we problem-solve.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Just a beginner\u2019s-mind question here. How does this work relate to what was happening in the Zulu tribe that Bert Hellinger observed? What were the tribal members doing in terms of relating to their ancestors that has any relationship to me and my Lego figures, trying to understand family patterns?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Much the same. They would go back until they could go, \u201cAh, there\u2019s a problem here.\u201d They\u2019re very good at sensing into the system. Unlike us who haven\u2019t been taught, they were taught from small. When you feel something, let\u2019s go and find where in the system it belongs. Where is the blockage? So where did the flow of life, love, career, success, where did that stop? And how am I aligned with that? And if I can see it and I can say to the ancestor, \u201cI see you,\u201d which we do in this work, too, \u201cI see you. That\u2019s your place and this is my place. And I can\u2019t take on your fate, but I can see you. And for you who couldn\u2019t move forward, will you watch me as I do?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS:<\/b> Let\u2019s say someone\u2019s listening and they go, \u201cGosh. I don\u2019t know very much about my grandparents, let alone my great grandparents or any further back in the family tree,\u201d or even further, if someone says, \u201cI was adopted. I know absolutely nothing even about my biological parents. This work\u2019s not for me. How would I do this?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>This work is absolutely for you. I have this question often. In fact, my daughter is adopted, so it\u2019s very near and dear to my heart. First thing you need to know is you\u2019re going to have two sets. You are related to your biological parents for that physical genetic component. The emotional genetics also, but you will get some from your other set of parents, of course. But what you do is you look at the events in your own life, you look at your own patterns of thoughts, feelings, and actions. And then, if you\u2019re adopted, you can actually compare, \u201cWhere am I so different? How do I look different? How do I feel different? How are my thoughts and actions different? Where are the patterns in my own life,\u201d because the beautiful thing is that even if we don\u2019t have that, those patterns echo down so faithfully that you are the repository of them right now. So all of the places where you are struggling, where you\u2019re frustrated, irritated, limited in any of those pieces, those are your limiting patterns that have traveled through, and they\u2019re saying, \u201cOK, what is the chapter that only you can write? What needs to stop and what needs to start?\u201d And that\u2019s what you do. You\u2019ve always got the answers within you.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. So let me just check this out if I\u2019m understanding you correctly. I can identify the limiting pattern in my life, and I might be able to even say, \u201cI can understand to some degree how it came from my parents, potentially,\u201d but I don\u2019t know anything beyond that. I don\u2019t need to know anything beyond that to do the work of transformation. Is it worth me imagining what happened to my grandparents or great grandparents? No point in that.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>No, there\u2019s no point.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Just work with the fact of what is right here in front of me.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>One thing I teach anybody that I work with or train is that you will not create facts. You work with what the facts are that you have, and what you have is plenty. You notice the idiosyncratic language that you use, because we all have it. Or the unique language, the unique feelings, the unique actions, those are yours. There\u2019s another way to understand it, too. You may not have access to them, but here\u2019s the deal.<\/span><\/p>\n

We now know. It\u2019s well studied. Epigenetically, there is an event that creates that imprint on the family system that then becomes the blueprint for generations of unconscious behavioral patterns. And that\u2019s what\u2019s coming through to you. We see that even when somebody says, \u201cI don\u2019t know my parents,\u201d and we say to them, \u201cSee if you can find something out about them.\u201d They link to those parents, and the similarities are remarkable. How\u2019s that possible? Epigenetically, the imprint has traveled. Your big opportunity is, neuroscientifically, to begin rewiring your thoughts, feelings, and actions. That is the big piece and the big transformation. \u201cWhat have I got? How is that wisdom? Where is the gift? Now, what can I do with that? Here I go.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>OK. There\u2019s two pieces of science you\u2019ve introduced here. Let\u2019s see if we can deepen our understanding of both. The first was the epigenetic inheritance. What\u2019s the science that\u2019s underneath that? And then we\u2019ll move to the neuroscientific change.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>There\u2019s a lot of research and studies that have been done. Three particular ones that are important, the great Dutch Hunger Winter, the Holocaust, of course, and 9\/11.<\/span><\/p>\n

With the great Dutch Hunger Winter, there was a city in the Netherlands that was completely surrounded for about three or four months by the Germans. They were punished for assisting the Allies, and the water and food was cut off. They existed on rats and whatever they could find, and bulbs, and all sorts of things. Because they were such an intact group, they were studied for generations after that. And what they found was mothers who\u2019d been pregnant with children at the time, depending on which trimester during which this occurred, would either produce children who were malnourished, or children who had an obesity problem, or who ate a lot and had all sorts of cortisol problems. And this was studied in the children. But the children\u2019s children, and the children\u2019s children\u2019s children exhibited the same characteristics. That intact group has been studied.<\/span><\/p>\n

Then we have the Holocaust, and you see things like ancestors who don\u2019t dare be too happy, or ancestors who benefit from the Holocaust allowance, who can\u2019t do too well, because in their minds, it\u2019s \u201cI must suffer like my ancestors did.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Then we get 9\/11, where they\u2019re now studying the PTSD markers that the mothers carried that are now expressing on the children too. So, there it is.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>When it comes to the neuroscience part, you also mentioned that \u201cI can rewire my brain.\u201d So this belief I have that \u201cI have to suffer in order to be true to the people who before me suffered.\u201d \u201cBut Judy\u2019s going to help me here and we\u2019re going to rewire this.\u201d How are we going to do that, and what\u2019s the science that shows what works?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Here\u2019s what it is. With neuroscience, we have neuroplastic brains. It\u2019s not set in stone. That\u2019s long been dismissed. With one new thought, one new feeling, one new action, instead of repeating ancient history, which is what 90 percent of us are doing, instead of repeating ancient history with just that one, one, one, we\u2019re beginning to change the neural patterns. We\u2019re beginning to lay down a neural pathway that\u2019s different. Now, instead of laying down suffering or trauma, we can lay down success and triumph.<\/span><\/p>\n

The triumph: you can lay down what I call a triumphant path or pathway as quickly as you can a traumatic one. With a traumatic one, if I go back and say, \u201cOK, Tami, I want you to tell me about that time when \u2026\u201d\u2014you can tell me what was there, who was there, how it was, what you remember. All of those pieces are there, what you\u2019re feeling, how it\u2019s triggering for you. You could do the same if you watch athletes who are rehearsing for what they\u2019re about to do. They\u2019re laying down the opposite and you can lay it down very quickly.<\/span><\/p>\n

But for most of us, all it takes is \u201cEverybody in my family suffered. Everybody in my culture suffers.\u201d So how does this benefit all of us, again? What might it be like if I took one small step and said, \u201cI\u2019d like to succeed. But I\u2019d like to succeed\u2014and because it\u2019s about me and my culture, I\u2019d like to showcase my culture. Perhaps I\u2019d like to give them dignity, and then, I\u2019d like to give them success.\u201d And we can show how evolving thought by thought, feeling by feeling, action by action, we\u2019ve actually moved from perhaps being a victim to a success, from being downtrodden to being celebrated, from being stuck to being possible. Would that be a terrible thing to do?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Obviously, and I\u2019m sure you can feel this, Judy, and I imagine that listeners can, too, this is all very personal for me, working with ancestral patterns, working with family patterns. Very personal, very deep for me. I\u2019m curious, as we\u2019re talking, I want to share with you what\u2019s coming up for me and to hear your view on it, which is this idea that I could present a gift to my family lineage of further growth. I\u2019m curious what you think of actually going through the inner imaginal exercise of imagining how they would respond to that and celebrate me. Do you think that\u2019s useful or is that just kind of like I\u2019m making stuff up?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>No. So, I\u2019m going to introduce another small piece here. I know we\u2019re talking about the book, but because people need to connect, what I\u2019ve also created are constellations meditations. And what it does is exactly what you\u2019re describing. It takes you deep into the lineage of your mother\u2014one is the mother, the other is the father\u2014and it takes you on the walk. It connects you all the way back to your ancestral line, right back to the beginning, turns you around, and walks you back in. I\u2019ve got goosebumps talking about it, I have to tell you. What you\u2019re doing is you are, with profound gratitude and sacredness, are journeying into the voyage of you, all the way back to the beginning, and you\u2019re pulling it all the way into the now.<\/span><\/p>\n

And as you are doing that, it is with gratitude, it is knowing that this is part of an exceptionally sacred journey, and it\u2019s been waiting for you. And of course, I\u2019m laughing as I\u2019m speaking to you in particular, who brings so much of that to the world, who keeps showcasing the ancestors, \u201cWhat do you think you are doing?\u201d You\u2019re honoring the ones who took you all the way here and said, \u201cCan you please give us a voice, and the place, and the belonging,\u201d and you\u2019re doing it every time you speak to someone else. Every time.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Thank you, Judy. Now, towards the end of the book, you talk about how we can use this work of decoding our emotional blueprint when we have a health challenge. And you even talk about how, you say, \u201cOur symptoms are gold,\u201d and of course, you\u2019re referring to all kinds of symptoms we might be observing in our psyche and the patterns, but also our health, our actual health. How could we use this work that you\u2019re describing if we\u2019re dealing with a health challenge of some kind?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>OK. If you\u2019re dealing with a health challenge, one of the things that I would say to you is, first, have a look if it does live in your ancestry. If it does, what step are you going to take that they couldn\u2019t? Let\u2019s bear in mind that medicine has come far, that lifestyle has come far. You are not doomed to what they were doomed to, but you\u2019ve got to start taking conscious steps. You\u2019ve got to look at it and say, \u201cDo I want to repeat this, or is it time for me to begin the journey to health?\u201d And then, the other piece, Tami, that\u2019s so important is if you look at the Holocaust, if you look at that great Dutch Hunger Winter or 9\/11, that would\u2019ve had profound effects on the nervous system, and of course, we know that impact health in all arenas.<\/span><\/p>\n

One of the other things I ask people is, \u201cWhere was the big event in your family system that began the health wobble, and what did it look like?\u201d Diabetically, was the sweetness taken out of life? If you cannot eat meat, could you not take the meat of life? Start looking at it quite literally to see how this expresses for you and how it wants to re-express in a healthy way. Yes, the mind is incredible, let\u2019s be very clear, but the minute you start working with it, one new thought, one new feeling, one new action, head, heart and gut, you are now no longer living by the hormones of stress, you\u2019re beginning to live in those elevated hormones. And the minute the body starts getting those healthy pieces in, it can deal. And the minute you start recognizing where it came from in your family and adding one new piece, you can deal.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>There\u2019s a quote from the book where you write, \u201cYour nervous system is not just your nervous system; many of its patterns, blocks, and triggers are multidimensional, multigenerational.\u201d I was like, \u201cWhat? My nervous system\u2019s not just my nervous system?\u201d So you\u2019re sort of saying that now, but help me understand that, especially if people say, \u201cI know that in my family tree, the kinds of stresses people were under, and I can only imagine what their nervous system had to go through to adapt to the situations they were in.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Exactly. And that didn\u2019t just stay there. Just think about it. All of this is happening. And I\u2019m saying to my\u2026 I\u2019m the great grandmother. I\u2019m going, \u201cBe careful, be careful, be careful, be careful.\u201d Now, your nervous system winds up and you\u2019re going, \u201cBe careful, be careful, be careful, be careful.\u201d So, now, we\u2019ve got two generations living under the biology of stress. And the next one, and the next one, until someone goes, \u201cI can\u2019t. Stop. What do I do here?\u201d \u201cRelax.\u201d \u201cHow?\u201d \u201cOne thought, one feeling, one action. You can\u2019t carry that anymore. You\u2019re too small to carry what went on back there. It\u2019s time to say, \u2018Thank you. I know where you came from. My journey \u2026\u2019\u201d I had a woman. I\u2019ll talk about her in a minute. \u201c\u2018My journey is to do it differently. For all of you who couldn\u2019t, you\u2019ve given me everything you could. It\u2019s my duty to take the gifts and move it forward in a healthy way.\u2019\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

I had a woman who came in, who said she couldn\u2019t sleep, she was in a really bad way, and she couldn\u2019t express emotion. We did a piece of work, and she started to cry, and she couldn\u2019t stop. It just poured. It just came, it just came, it just came. She looked at me and she said, \u201cWhat is this work? There\u2019s something wrong with me. Look what\u2019s happening.\u201d I said to her, \u201cStop. You told me that four generations ago, the shock was so bad for your great grandmother that she went crazy, and she never expressed an emotion after that. And since then, none of the women have been able to. You\u2019re crying five generations of tears. Let them flow. That\u2019s what we do.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS:<\/b> As we come to an end of our conversation, Judy, I\u2019m curious to know more. How do you see your work in the world as a way of furthering the evolution and the gifts that are coming through you of your lineage, your biographical lineage? How do you see that?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Wow. I think you asked me two questions. I\u2019m going to try and sort of separate them. So, how do I see my work in the world? I think the work in the world is simply to show people, \u201cYou are not a victim. You never were. You\u2019re not. You are a gift. It\u2019s to make that shift so you begin to understand how important you are, how possible you are, and how much of a gift you must be to the world. And by the way, it\u2019s a ton of fun. It\u2019s a big adventure. Life is amazing when you start to live it from that perspective. It really is. You must want, and you must want a lot. That\u2019s how the world evolves. And for goodness\u2019 sake, make it fun. It\u2019s not greedy. It\u2019s not selfish. It\u2019s empowering you and everyone around you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

For me, I think, if I look at it, I really stand on the shoulders of so many who came before me, incredibly honest, wise, kind, possible people who didn\u2019t have the opportunities, but did the very best they could. I got the opportunity to move to a place where opportunity abounds, and for me to not take it all\u2026 I think if I look at that and I look at the universe, if the universe gave me enough of a brain to do something, in my view, I\u2019m very much like Walt Disney who is probably my favorite being in the world. It\u2019s kind of fun to do the impossible and kind of lazy if you don\u2019t. I think I\u2019m really bent on pushing the envelope as far as I can for everybody, so they love who they are, where they came from, what they\u2019re doing, and who they\u2019re becoming. I would say that\u2019s it.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>I\u2019ve been talking with Judy Wilkins-Smith. She\u2019s written a deep and packed new book, filled with practical exercises, things you can do, journaling, practices\u2014it\u2019s packed. It\u2019s called <\/span>Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint: A Powerful Guide to Transformation Through Disentangling Multigenerational Patterns<\/span><\/i>. It\u2019s fun to talk to you and this book is fun to read. Thank you so much for all of your great work and your contribution, Judy.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

JWS: <\/b>Thank you for having me. And I would say to you very gently, your ancestors thank you for what you did.<\/span><\/p>\n

TS: <\/b>Thanks for listening to <\/span>Insights at the Edge<\/span><\/i>. You can read a full transcript of today\u2019s interview at resources2.soundstrue.com\/Podcast. That\u2019s resources2.soundstrue.com\/Podcast. If you\u2019re interested, hit the Subscribe button in your podcast app. If you feel inspired, head to iTunes and leave <\/span>Insights at the Edge<\/span><\/i> a review. I absolutely love getting your feedback and being connected. Sounds True: waking up the world.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"template":"","meta":{"_expiration-date-status":"","_expiration-date":0,"_expiration-date-type":"","_expiration-date-categories":[],"_expiration-date-options":[]},"class_list":["post-19701","transcript","type-transcript","status-publish","hentry"],"yoast_head":"\nDecoding Your Emotional Blueprint - Transcript | Sounds True<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Read the full transcript from this Sounds True conversation with Decoding Your Emotional Blueprint. 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