Your Brain on Love
- Product Review (submitted on February 12, 2015):
It seemed very black and white, without much insight into complex relationships that don't fall under his classifications. It also doesn't seem to include ppl who are quite self-aware + have already done a lot of work. For example, i'm definitely in his 'island' category as per my upbringing, but 80% of what he says about me as an adult doesn't apply: i'm not motivated by shame, i don't become more secretive in relationship but the opposite, i do enjoy close physical contact + do not want my partner to get it in their head that they should 'pull away sooner than they feel' to 'give me space'. i do lose track of time, but i don't think that's due to my relationship style; and yes, i enjoy spending time alone but so does my 'wave' friend who gets overstimulated by too much interaction.
To me, i see island, wave anchor in everyone in different aspects -- at which point the terms don't really have any use anymore.
I also don't like his statements 'everybody's a burden', 'everybody's annoying', etc. It's our perception of someone being these things that exists in reality, not that they are intrinsically so, ie 'we feel annoyed by X that Y did'.