Jack Kornfield: Difficult Times & Liberation

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July 31, 2016

Jack Kornfield: Difficult Times & Liberation

Jack Kornfield July 31, 2016

Jack Kornfield is a world-renowned teacher and one of the key figures to introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West. He is the author of many books and audio programs, including The Wise Heart and After the Ecstasy, the Laundry. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Jack and Tami Simon discuss Buddhist views of how best to navigate periods of difficulty and heartache. Jack reflects on four decades of personal meditation practice and how this has informed how he works with students. Jack and Tami also explore insights into the nature of suffering, whether or not it is possible to be liberated even in spite of our neuroses, and what is meant by ”the crystal of liberation.”
(49 minutes)

Jack Kornfield, PhD, trained as a Buddhist monk in Thailand, Burma, and India and has taught worldwide since 1974. He is one of the key teachers to introduce Buddhist mindfulness practices to the West. He is the co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society and of Spirit Rock Center in Woodacre, California. He is a husband, grandfather, and activist and holds a PhD in clinical psychology. He has written more than fifteen books including The Wise Heart; A Path with Heart; After the Ecstasy, the Laundry; and more. For more, visit jackkornfield.com.

Listen to Tami Simon's in-depth audio podcast interviews with Jack Kornfield:
Big Insights: The Power of Awareness to Change Your Life »
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Founded Sounds True in 1985 as a multimedia publishing house with a mission to disseminate spiritual wisdom. She hosts a popular weekly podcast called Insights at the Edge, where she has interviewed many of today's leading teachers. Tami lives with her wife, Julie M. Kramer, and their two spoodles, Rasberry and Bula, in Boulder, Colorado.

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Also By Author

3 Simple Habits of a Loving Kindness Practice

3 Simple Habits of a Loving Kindness Practice Header Image

Are you interested in studying loving kindness more in-depth? Check out Jack Kornfield and Tara Brach’s The Power of Awareness, a 7-week mindfulness training and community mentoring program beginning February 18, 2020. Can’t wait? Take advantage of the free video teachings.

 

“A little kingdom I possess, where thoughts and feelings dwell; and very hard the task I find of governing it well.”
—Louisa May Alcott

In his video Seeing the Goodness, Jack Kornfield refers to the practice of loving kindness as “seeing the original innocence, dignity, and beauty of another.”

At first glance, this might sound like a simple thing to do. But what makes loving kindness (also known as lovingkindness) a practice rather than a feeling?

I believe we all have the capacity to embrace loving kindness in our daily lives. Of course, that doesn’t mean it’s an easy task. When I sat down to do one of Jack Kornfield’s loving kindness meditations (find it here), I found it surprisingly difficult. Cross-legged on the carpet, I pushed my headphones into my ears and listened carefully to every word—until I couldn’t anymore, and I turned it off.

For the rest of the day, I wondered, why? I think of myself as a kind person. Plus, I meditate fairly regularly. So what was it about this practice I found so difficult?

I ruminated and ruminated. Finally, as I lay in bed drifting off to sleep the other night, the answer came to me at once. My whole life, I’ve been doing it backward—extending love to others and then, only at the end, if there was space left, extending it out to myself. And there isn’t always space left.

WHAT IS LOVING KINDNESS?

loving kindness practice hand

Loving kindness is not just about empathy, presence, and listening in regards to others. It is part of the difficult inner work we all face. This is the work of finding self-forgiveness, releasing shame and guilt, and loving ourselves for exactly who we are. Loving kindness is kind of like looking at ourselves and expressing love—then letting that love reverberate, like two mirrors reflecting one another into infinity.

“Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.”
—Confucius

It’s a practice of recognizing our own inner beauty and watching it manifest as love and healthy attachment in our relationships. It’s about embracing compassion as a state of enlightenment, as the highest nature of ourselves and the true nature of God. It’s about seeing beyond guilt and shame to the fundamental, universal innocence of all beings.

The origins of the word innocent are various. They are even more fascinating when taken together. In the 12th century, the word inocent (Old French) meant simply “harmless; not guilty; pure.” The prefix, in, meaning not or un-, is attached to the suffix nocere (Latin), meaning “to harm.” Nocere itself originated from the root nek-, meaning “death.” In that regard, we can read innocence as meaning not harmful or not deathful; not yielding death. Infinite.

GENTLE HABITS FOR CULTIVATING LOVING KINDNESS

loving kindness practice habitsI don’t think I’m alone in finding it easier to extend compassion to others than to myself. And I don’t think I’m alone in experiencing repeated bouts of resentment and sadness toward people I love—probably partly from expecting to receive my self-worth from them.

So, how do you get started on something that seems so simple, but isn’t?

Here are three small, but profound, ways to gently maintain a lovingkindness practice.

GROUNDING

What helps you relax? Write down a list of things that help you feel calm, creative and focused. Maybe you feel better after a long shower or bath. I know people who absolutely love puzzling, coloring and Sodoku for this. It can be talking to a good friend, taking a walk, spending some time in nature, or curling up with a good book, watching television, meditating, or yoga. The list can be as long as you want!

As you practice loving kindness, begin to recognize whenever you feel uprooted: instead of compassionate, you might feel irritated, resentful, or bitter. You might feel afraid instead of loving. You might feel defensive instead of communicative. Hold these grounding practices close to your heart and use them whenever needed. They are for you.

SELF-COMPASSION

Jack Kornfield writes in A Path with Heart: A Guide Through the Perils and Promises of Spiritual Life, “Much of spiritual life is self-acceptance, maybe all of it.” One of the things that’s hard about lovingkindness, I think, is that it’s possible to feel loving of others while quietly holding onto self-doubt. Whether it’s daily, weekly, or multiple times a day, make a plan for checking in with yourself: How are those inner voices speaking to you right now?

Once you do this enough, it becomes a habit, maybe even automatic. You can get to know these voices, and they can get to know you. They will learn what can and cannot be tolerated and that you value being treated gently, just as you wish to treat others. It is a vital first step on the path toward loving kindness—one that, for many, is the most difficult, but affects our spiritual practice from every direction.

GRATITUDE

Gratitude is like an orb of everything you want from loving kindness. It is a way to thank yourself, others, and the Universe all at once.  The closest to real peace I’ve ever felt was in a moment of gratitude. I felt suspended in the air.

In a grateful space of consciousness, it is much easier to have compassion for others. We can see further into different perspectives. We can have mercy on ourselves. Gratitude is not about removing boundaries, but about understanding this moment as an irreplaceable one. It’s about comprehending that each person is infinitely unique, including you.

 

ABOUT JACK KORNFIELD

Jack Kornfield Author Photo
Jack Kornfield, PhD, trained as a Buddhist monk in Thailand, Burma, and India and has taught worldwide since 1974. He is one of the key teachers to introduce Buddhist mindfulness practices to the West. He holds a PhD in clinical psychology and is the co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society and of Spirit Rock Center in Woodacre, California. He has written more than a dozen books including The Wise Heart; A Path With HeartAfter the Ecstasy, the Laundry; and more.

ABOUT THE AUTHORDani Ferrara Blogger Author Photo

When she isn’t writing, playing music or teaching, Dani Ferrara blogs at Sounds True and researches the alchemy of healing. Explore her art at daniferrarapoet.com.

Jack Kornfield and Tara Brach: Big Insights: The Power...

Jack Kornfield and Tara Brach are two of the leading authorities on mindfulness and meditation in the West. Jack is the bestselling author and teacher widely credited with combining mindfulness with modern western psychology. Tara has been teaching meditation for more than four decades and is the author of Radical Acceptance and True Refuge. In this special edition of Insights at the Edge originally recorded in 2015, Tami Simon sits down with both Jack and Tara to discuss the big insights that form the foundation of mindfulness practice. They speak on the concept of awareness itself and how to distinguish “awareness” from “thinking.” Tara and Jack share some of the everyday benefits of a meditation practice, including personal clarity and more conscious relationships. Finally, Jack, Tara, and Tami have a frank conversation on how awareness training could affect the state of the world. (60 minutes)

Jack Kornfield: Difficult Times & Liberation

Jack Kornfield is a world-renowned teacher and one of the key figures to introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West. He is the author of many books and audio programs, including The Wise Heart and After the Ecstasy, the Laundry. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Jack and Tami Simon discuss Buddhist views of how best to navigate periods of difficulty and heartache. Jack reflects on four decades of personal meditation practice and how this has informed how he works with students. Jack and Tami also explore insights into the nature of suffering, whether or not it is possible to be liberated even in spite of our neuroses, and what is meant by ”the crystal of liberation.”
(49 minutes)

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  • Healing Approach: Awareness becomes effective when paired with pacing, care, and nervous system support

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What Is Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness and How It Differs from Traditional Mindfulness

Trauma sensitive mindfulness begins with a simple truth. The present moment does not feel safe for everyone. Turning inward can bring up intense sensations or emotions, and traditional mindfulness does not always account for how trauma shapes this experience.

This approach offers a gentler entry point. It considers how the body responds before asking it to be still. Instead of pushing through discomfort, it allows for choice, movement, and grounding.

Mindfulness then becomes less about doing it right and more about building a relationship with our experience. We learn to notice what feels supportive, pause when needed, and meet ourselves with care.

Elizabeth Stanley’s Approach to Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness and Healing

Elizabeth Stanley’s work brings clarity to why trauma sensitive mindfulness matters and how it can be practiced in a way that truly supports healing. Her perspective is grounded in both research and lived experience, creating a bridge between science and personal transformation.

Her Background in Trauma and Resilience

Stanley’s background includes years of studying resilience under extreme stress, alongside her own journey through trauma recovery. She emphasizes that resilience is not simply about mental strength. It is about the capacity of the nervous system to return to balance after disruption.

Through trauma sensitive mindfulness, she highlights how this capacity can be strengthened over time. The practice becomes less about observing thoughts and more about learning how to stay connected to the body without becoming overwhelmed.

The Limits of Traditional Mindfulness Practices

In her teaching, Stanley also speaks to the limitations of traditional mindfulness approaches. Many practices assume that the body can tolerate sustained attention. For someone carrying unresolved trauma, that assumption may not hold true.

Trauma sensitive mindfulness acknowledges that awareness alone is not always enough. Without support, attention can amplify distress rather than ease it. By integrating regulation and pacing, this approach creates a more supportive path that allows mindfulness to unfold gradually.

Why Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Changes the Way We Practice Meditation

When we begin to understand mindfulness through the lens of trauma sensitivity, the practice itself starts to shift. Meditation is no longer about holding attention in one place at all costs. It becomes a responsive and adaptive experience.

Meditation Through the Lens of Trauma Sensitivity

In trauma sensitive mindfulness, meditation can include a wide range of options. A person might keep their eyes open, shift their focus between internal and external awareness, or engage in gentle movement. These choices are not distractions from the practice. They are part of the practice.

This flexibility helps create a sense of stability. It allows the practitioner to remain engaged without pushing beyond their capacity.

Creating Safety Within the Practice

Safety is not treated as an outcome. It is the foundation. Trauma sensitive mindfulness invites us to notice when something feels supportive and when it does not. That noticing becomes a form of guidance.

Over time, this builds trust. The practitioner begins to feel that they can stay present without losing themselves in the experience. Meditation then becomes a space where healing can happen at a natural pace.

When Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Is Needed Beyond Standard Meditation

There are times when traditional mindfulness practices may not provide the support someone needs. Trauma sensitive mindfulness helps us recognize those moments with clarity and care.

Recognizing Signs That Mindfulness Alone Is Not Enough

Some people notice that meditation brings up anxiety, numbness, or a sense of disconnection. Others may feel flooded by emotion or unable to stay grounded. These experiences are not signs of failure. They are signals from the nervous system.

Trauma sensitive mindfulness encourages us to respond to these signals rather than push through them.

Expanding Beyond Stillness Into Regulation

In these moments, the practice may shift. Instead of remaining still, a person might focus on their surroundings, engage in movement, or connect with a steady rhythm like walking or breathing with sound.

These forms of regulation help restore balance. They create a pathway back to presence that feels supportive rather than overwhelming.

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The Role of the Nervous System in Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Practice

Trauma sensitive mindfulness recognizes that the nervous system plays a central role in how we experience awareness. Before we can rest in presence, the body needs to sense that it is safe enough to do so.

  • The nervous system constantly interprets signals of safety and threat, often outside of conscious awareness
  • Trauma can leave the body in patterns of activation or shutdown that shape how mindfulness feels
  • Trauma sensitive mindfulness introduces gentle ways to support regulation before deep attention is invited
  • Small moments of ease help the nervous system learn that presence can be safe
  • Choice allows the practitioner to stay connected without feeling trapped in the experience

As these patterns begin to shift, mindfulness becomes more accessible. The body no longer experiences awareness as something to defend against. Instead, it becomes a place where steadiness can grow.

How to Practice Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Safely and Effectively

Practicing trauma sensitive mindfulness begins with a willingness to move at the pace of the body. There is no need to force stillness or sustain attention beyond what feels manageable. Instead, we begin by noticing what feels supportive in the moment.

This might include grounding attention in the senses, feeling the contact of the body with a chair, or simply noticing the environment. At times, it may mean stepping away from internal awareness and focusing outward. These choices are not interruptions. They are expressions of care.

Over time, this approach builds a sense of trust. The practitioner learns that they can engage with mindfulness without becoming overwhelmed. Safety becomes something that is felt, not something that is assumed. From this foundation, awareness can deepen in a way that feels steady and sustainable.

Bringing Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness into Daily Life and Relationships

Trauma sensitive mindfulness does not remain confined to formal practice. It naturally extends into daily life. It can be present in the way we pause before responding, in how we notice tension in the body, or in the decision to take a moment of rest.

In relationships, this awareness can create space. Instead of reacting automatically, we begin to sense what is happening within us. This allows for more thoughtful responses and a greater sense of connection.

These small moments matter. They reflect a shift from striving to be present toward allowing presence to emerge. In this way, mindfulness becomes integrated into the rhythm of everyday life.

Building Resilience Through Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Over Time

Resilience develops gradually. It is shaped through repeated experiences of safety, awareness, and regulation. Trauma sensitive mindfulness supports this process by honoring the body’s natural pace.

Each moment of grounded awareness strengthens the nervous system’s capacity to remain present. Over time, this creates a sense of stability that can hold a wider range of experiences.

This path is not about reaching a fixed state. It is about developing a relationship with ourselves that is steady, responsive, and compassionate. Through trauma sensitive mindfulness, we begin to discover that presence is not something we force. It is something that becomes possible as the body learns it is safe to be here.

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Final Thoughts

Trauma sensitive mindfulness invites a more compassionate way of being present. Rather than pushing through discomfort, it encourages us to listen to the body and move at a pace that feels supportive.

Elizabeth Stanley’s insights remind us that awareness and regulation go hand in hand. As we honor both, mindfulness becomes a steady, healing practice that meets us exactly where we are.

Frequently Asked Questions About Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness

What makes trauma sensitive mindfulness different from trauma informed care?

Trauma sensitive mindfulness is a specific approach within the broader framework of trauma informed care. While trauma informed care can apply to many fields, such as healthcare or education, trauma sensitive mindfulness focuses directly on how mindfulness practices are adapted to support nervous system safety and regulation.

Can trauma sensitive mindfulness be practiced without a teacher?

Yes, it can be practiced individually, especially with gentle awareness and self-guided pacing. However, some people benefit from working with a trained practitioner who understands trauma and can offer guidance when difficult experiences arise.

Is trauma sensitive mindfulness suitable for beginners?

Yes, it is often more accessible for beginners because it emphasizes choice and flexibility. Instead of requiring strict focus, it allows people to ease into awareness in a way that feels manageable.

How long does it take to see benefits from trauma sensitive mindfulness?

The experience varies from person to person. Some may notice small shifts in awareness and calm within a short time, while bigger changes in resilience and regulation tend to develop gradually through consistent practice.

Can trauma sensitive mindfulness replace therapy?

It is not a replacement for therapy, especially for those working through significant trauma. It can be a supportive complement to therapeutic work, helping individuals build awareness and regulation skills alongside professional support.

What types of practices are included in trauma sensitive mindfulness?

Practices may include grounding exercises, sensory awareness, gentle movement, and flexible attention techniques. The focus is on what supports stability rather than following a fixed method.

How does trauma sensitive mindfulness support physical well-being?

By helping regulate the nervous system, this approach can reduce chronic stress responses in the body. Over time, this may support improved sleep, reduced tension, and a greater sense of ease.

Is it normal to feel discomfort during trauma sensitive mindfulness?

Some discomfort can arise, especially when becoming more aware of internal experiences. The key difference is that this approach encourages responding to discomfort with care, rather than pushing through it.

Can trauma sensitive mindfulness be practiced in short moments?

Yes, it is well suited for brief, everyday moments. Even a few seconds of grounding or awareness can support regulation and help build consistency over time.

Who can benefit most from trauma sensitive mindfulness?

Anyone can benefit, but it is especially supportive for individuals who find traditional meditation challenging or overwhelming. It offers an alternative path that honors personal capacity.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator's Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.