Mary O’Malley: What’s in the Way Is the Way

    —
October 16, 2018

Mary O’Malley: What’s in the Way Is the Way

Mary O’Malley October 16, 2018

Mary O’Malley is an author, counselor, and acknowledged leader in the field of spiritual awakening. With Sounds True, Mary has published What’s in the Way Is the Way: A Practical Guide for Waking Up to Life. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Mary discuss the eight “spells” that keep us feeling separate from life—as well as the remedies that bring us more fully into the energetic flow of existence. They speak on the need for curiosity and the role it plays in uniting our attention with our present-moment experience. Finally, Mary explains her understanding of the awakening process and the skills one can cultivate to come into a robust and joyous alignment with life itself. (60 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway
One of the worst feelings for me is helplessness. Mary teaches that “life is destined to bring up what is bound up.” This podcast brought up for me how I push away feelings of helplessness. According to Mary, “what’s in the way is the way,” and we can become what she calls “tightness detectives” to see how we clamp down in certain situations and resist what we don’t want to feel. When instead we meet our feelings with curiosity and spaciousness, we discover the free flow of aliveness and the absolute trustworthiness in every experience.

Photo of ()\

Mary O'Malley is an author, counselor, and acknowledged leader in the field of awakening. Through her writing and teaching, she empowers people to work with the difficulties of life in a way that enhances their capacity for joy. For more, visit maryomalley.com.

Listen to Tami Simon's in-depth audio podcast interview with Mary O'Malley:
What's in the Way Is the Way »

600 Podcasts and Counting…

Subscribe to Insights at the Edge to hear all of Tami’s interviews (transcripts available too!), featuring Eckhart Tolle, Caroline Myss, Tara Brach, Jack Kornfield, Adyashanti, and many more.

Meet Your Host: Tami Simon

Founded Sounds True in 1985 as a multimedia publishing house with a mission to disseminate spiritual wisdom. She hosts a popular weekly podcast called Insights at the Edge, where she has interviewed many of today's leading teachers. Tami lives with her wife, Julie M. Kramer, and their two spoodles, Rasberry and Bula, in Boulder, Colorado.

Photo © Jason Elias

Also By Author

Mary O’Malley: What’s in the Way Is the Way

Mary O’Malley is an author, counselor, and acknowledged leader in the field of spiritual awakening. With Sounds True, Mary has published What’s in the Way Is the Way: A Practical Guide for Waking Up to Life. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Mary discuss the eight “spells” that keep us feeling separate from life—as well as the remedies that bring us more fully into the energetic flow of existence. They speak on the need for curiosity and the role it plays in uniting our attention with our present-moment experience. Finally, Mary explains her understanding of the awakening process and the skills one can cultivate to come into a robust and joyous alignment with life itself. (60 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway
One of the worst feelings for me is helplessness. Mary teaches that “life is destined to bring up what is bound up.” This podcast brought up for me how I push away feelings of helplessness. According to Mary, “what’s in the way is the way,” and we can become what she calls “tightness detectives” to see how we clamp down in certain situations and resist what we don’t want to feel. When instead we meet our feelings with curiosity and spaciousness, we discover the free flow of aliveness and the absolute trustworthiness in every experience.

Are You Enough?

By Mary O’Malley

Are you enough?  Take a moment and be honest with yourself.  Do you live with a sense that you are okay and life is okay exactly as it is? Probably not, because you, like most people, have been conditioned to think that you need to be better or different to be okay. This brings forth the belief that it is only when you get it all together (in the future) that you will be enough.

To get a glimpse into this constant seeking, ask yourself these questions:

Is your body enough because you have gotten rid of the weight, the wrinkles, the too big nose?

Is your mate enough, always relating to you in ways that you want them to?

Are your meditations enough, or are you always seeking for better states of mind?

Are your career, your finances, even your children ever enough in your mind?

If you look closely, you would have to say that, even though your life is how you want it to be for moments, your mind always takes over again in its endless search for lasting satisfaction. We are all like a hungry ghost searching, searching, searching. We seek and long and grasp at what our mind says will bring lasting satisfaction, only to get caught in the illusion that more, more, more will finally fill the empty hole inside of us:

You finally lose the weight and then think either you should lose five more pounds or you become afraid of gaining it back.

You find your perfect mate only to discover six months into the relationship that there are things about them that drive you crazy.

You finally get a raise at work only to find out that you’re living in the same financial stress because you can now buy fancier toys or more complex plastic surgeries, hoping that this will bring you lasting satisfaction.

Stephen Levine once told a story about a 93-year-old woman on her deathbed who said, “It can’t end now because it hasn’t started yet!” It is amazing that most of us don’t see this endless search for satisfaction and how unsatisfying it is in the long run.

If you look with great curiosity, you will see that this search for something out there – a skinnier body, a different mate, more money, deeper meditations, better sex, a happier mind, a fancier house, more, more, more – is a thirst that will never be quenched except for a moment here and a moment there. Read the studies on how much misery winning the lottery brings into people’s lives and you will see the truth of this.

What would happen if you discovered that there is a field of enoughness that is always with you? What would happen if you finally understood that the deep and lasting satisfaction you have been searching for your whole life is always here? To look for lasting satisfaction in the constantly changing flow of life is suffering. To relax the search for more, more, more and to discover an intimate connection with this living moment of your life is to finally come home.

I invite you for a moment to stop reading this blog and lift your eyes to receive your life. This is a unique moment in your life and it is the only moment that matters. See it as if you have never been on this planet before.  Even if you have been in this exact place a thousand times, still, it is brand new.

If your attention doesn’t yet know how to ground here, close your eyes and focus on all the sounds that are arising and passing. There are loud sounds like somebody talking in the next room and soft sounds, like the hum of your computer.  There are sounds far away like an airplane in the sky and there are sounds very close like your breath in your nostrils.

To truly listen to your life is to come home to the only moment that matters – right now. And in an intimate connection with Life the moment it appears out of mystery, you are no longer caught in the endless and unsatisfactory search for satisfaction.

Of course, when your mind sees this, it is very likely that its newest search will be to try to live in ‘the now’, for it believes that will bring it lasting satisfaction.  This doesn’t work! Why? For you are already in the now and any attempt to get there is just more searching.

But what you can do is remember that in all your searching you are already home. You don’t need to try to get here. Instead you can discover how to see and not get seduced into the endless search for satisfaction. Whenever you are caught in wanting things to be different than what they are, it can help to simply say to yourself, “This moment is enough, exactly as it is. I am enough, exactly as I am.”

In order to rest in your natural enoughness, it is important to recognize that nothing in this ever-changing world will bring lasting satisfaction. It can certainly bring temporary happiness and we can enjoy that happiness. But to require that Life, in its ever-changing flow, is where lasting satisfaction will be found is truly suffering.

You can also understand that life is putting you in the exact set of circumstances that will allow you to see how restless and busy your mind is in trying to get to the peace you long for.

You can also finally understand that it is truly a blessing to not get what you want. The pain of having your constant search blocked is the doorway out of the endless seeking and back into an intimate connection with Life. For, what is in the way IS the way!

If you are interested in exploring this further, I encourage you to visit my website and listen to my Radio Show. I am also offering a class on What’s in the Way IS the Way.

———————————–

Mary O’Malley is an author, counselor and awakening mentor in Kirkland, Washington. In the early 1970’s, a powerful awakening led Mary to begin changing her relationship with her challenges, freeing her from a lifelong struggle with darkness. Mary’s latest book, What’s In the Way Is the Way, provides a revolutionary approach for healing your fears, anxieties, shame, and confusion, so you can live from a place of ease.

 

Mary O’Malley: What’s in the Way Is the Way

Mary O’Malley is an author, counselor, and acknowledged leader in the field of spiritual awakening. With Sounds True, Mary has published What’s in the Way Is the Way: A Practical Guide for Waking Up to Life. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Mary discuss the eight “spells” that keep us feeling separate from life—as well as the remedies that bring us more fully into the energetic flow of existence. They speak on the need for curiosity, and the role it plays in uniting our attention with our present-moment experience. Finally, Mary explains her understanding of the awakening process and the skills one can cultivate to come into a robust and joyous alignment with life itself.
(60 minutes)

You Might Also Enjoy

Phenomena Finale: Not a Machine but a Flame [Takeover]

What is the “energy” in energy healing? Healers channel it. Patients reach for it. Ancient healing traditions built entire systems around it, and modern researchers are working to study it. But what is energy, biologically, physically, measurably…but also spiritually, and how does it move through the body to influence health and healing?

In this special feed takeover, we’re bringing you the season finale of Phenomena: The Science and Stories of Energy Healing, in which host Ivy Ross brings together three renowned scientists whose visions, taken together, begin to answer that question:

  • Martin Picard, PhD, of Columbia University, has spent his career studying mitochondria, the body’s cellular power sources, and has found them far more connected to our inner experience and consciousness than biomedicine ever assumed, and likely far more central to how we heal.
  • Richard Hammerschlag, PhD, co-authored the paper that helped define the modern science of the biofield: the organizing fields of energy and information that operate within the body and extend outward from it, echoing the nested qi fields of older healing traditions.
  • Neil Theise, MD, of NYU, helped identify the interstitium, a major recent discovery of a fluid-filled network running throughout the body that may explain how signals fundamental to health and healing actually travel.

Together, these three voices offer a compelling, deeply human vision of the body and mind not as a machine, but as a dynamic energetic ecosystem.

To close out the season, Ivy and researcher Meredith Sprengel also welcome special guest Jonathan Cohen, co-creator and executive producer of Mayim Bialik’s Breakdown, to help land these big ideas about energy, healing, and life.

This episode marks the finale of Phenomena‘s first season. To continue the journey and explore the full docuseries, visit phenomenahealing.com. →

Just One Question | Osho Zenju Earthlyn Manuel: How Ca...

When we heard Osho Zenju Earthlyn Manuel share her story of a terrifying night she couldn’t breathe, it was eerily similar to a personal experience—and helpful too. We knew we had to share this moment from her conversation with Tami Simon on Insights at the Edge, in which she tells the story of the night she nearly died from a severe anaphylactic reaction and how she got through it not by searching for light at the end of the tunnel, but by staying present with the darkness itself. 

Zenju, a poet and ordained Zen Buddhist priest, challenges the instinct most of us have to fear darkness, rush out of it, or wait for a gift on the other side. Instead, she describes an experience of profound non-struggle — a moment of near-death where she wasn’t afraid, didn’t fight, and somehow found a way to keep breathing by trusting her body completely.

Key themes from this episode:

  • Why darkness — and even light — may be far more unknown and unknowable than we assume
  • How struggling against a frightening experience can make it worse, while staying present with it can be transformative
  • A firsthand account of surviving a full-blown anaphylactic shock without fear
  • Rethinking our cultural instinct to rush ourselves and others out of difficult emotional or physical states
  • Why “the absence of light” might be less about despair and more about a different kind of awakening

Taken from the full Insights at the Edge conversation with Zenju Earthlyn Manuel “Opening to Darkness,” which is also the title of her book. Find the complete interview in this feed or at soundstrue.com.

This episode is sponsored by Omega Institute, a global gathering hub for lifelong learning and spiritual exploration. Omega offers weekend workshops, special events, rest and rejuvenation retreats, professional training, online learning, and more. Discover what calls to you at eomega.org/true.

Michael A. Singer: The Pain That Ends All Pain


What if the pain you’ve been avoiding is actually the thing that could set you free?

This week, Tami Simon speaks with Michael A. Singer, beloved wisdom teacher, founder of the Temple of the Universe, and author of The Untethered Soul, The Surrender Experiment, Living Untethered, and his newest book, Wisdom Untethered: The Time for Questions. Drawn from 1,200 reader questions distilled into 200 essential ones, the conversation keeps returning to a single teaching Michael once received from a saint: “It’s the pain that ends all pain.”

Join Tami and Michael to explore:

  • Why “letting go” is an inner practice, not spiritual bypassing or passivity
  • What samskaras are, and why blocked energy, not memory, is the real source of inner darkness
  • Why the willingness to feel disturbance, rather than suppress it, is the actual path of purification
  • The practice of “falling behind” resistance, and other techniques for letting stuck energy move and release
  • The difference between preferences and fears, and why the Buddha named preference as the root of suffering
  • How to face real-world injustice with clarity instead of ego-driven reactivity
  • Why the true motive of spiritual practice is simply to let go of what’s in the way

Whether you’ve read The Untethered Soul a dozen times or are new to Michael’s teachings, this conversation offers both the practical tools and the felt experience of what it means to stop blocking the shakti that’s already flowing within you.

Listen now, and discover why the pain you’ve been running from might be exactly what ends it. →

This conversation offers genuine transmission, not just concepts about awakening, but the palpable presence of realized teachers exploring the growing edge of spiritual understanding together, and originally aired on Sounds True One.

Insights at the Edge is supported by Magic Hour, whose ceremonial teas carry more presence, beauty, and ritual into ordinary days. Magic Hour draws its leaves and botanicals from regenerative small farms around the world, in blends made to nourish the body and open the mind.

Explore their teas, matchas, and herbal rituals at clubmagichour.com. Get 20% off your first order with the code TRUE.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *