Give Yourself Permission to Take Up Space

    —
April 18, 2023

Dearest Friend,

We live in a world full of deadlines. Alarms. Screaming kids. Nagging bosses. More on our to-do lists than we could accomplish in three lifetimes. It’s easy for your needs to get buried underneath the rubble of daily life, and figuring out how to reconnect with your authentic self can feel touch and go… at best.

I wrote Needy: How to Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty to lovingly provide the space for you to better understand your needs, experiment with new habits that help you meet those needs each day, and build a resilient connection with yourself that you can rely upon for good.

You have needs—your needs matter. And yet, you’ve been taught that pushing your needs to the back burner is the only way to get things done, that your needs are an overwhelming burden, or that self-care is a luxury you can’t afford. But the presence of your needs is a fact and not a flaw. You can reclaim your energy and give yourself permission to take up space in the center of your own life.

In Needy, I share my unique approach to identifying, honoring, and advocating for the most tender and true parts of yourself that yearn to be acknowledged. It is an invitation to embody self-acceptance, which leads to meaningful growth in self-responsibility, self-care, self-trust, and self-love.

This book will be a delicious companion for your journey, but you actually can begin caring for yourself with greater tenderness and open communication right now.

I invite you to take the next three minutes to check in with yourself.

Put down your phone, close your computer, and put your hand on your heart.

Breath deeply into your belly and ask yourself:

How do I feel?

What do I need?

What does my body need from me?

What is ONE, doable need that I am ready, able, and willing to meet?

Real self-care is responsive, not prescriptive. The care you are aching for right now will be found in asking yourself those four questions. Give yourself permission to start with one, tangible action.

And repeat as necessary.

Need more? I will see you between the pages of Needy. I am so grateful to be able to share this book with you, and I hope you will share it with the humans in your life who struggle to take up space in this way.

xx Mara

Mara Glatzel, MSW, (she/her) is an intuitive coach, writer, and podcast host. She is a needy human who helps other needy humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy cycles. Her superpower is saying what you need to hear when you need to hear it, and she is here to help you believe in yourself as much as she believes in you. Find out more at maraglatzel.com.

Mara Glatzel

Mara Glatzel, MSW, (she/her) is an intuitive coach, writer, and podcast host. She is a needy human who helps other needy humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy cycles. Her superpower is saying what you need to hear when you need to hear it, and she is here to help you believe in yourself as much as she believes in you. She resides on the tip of Cape Cod, Massachusetts. Find out more at maraglatzel.com.

Author photo © Emily Tebbetts

Also By Author

Give Yourself Permission to Take Up Space

Dearest Friend,

We live in a world full of deadlines. Alarms. Screaming kids. Nagging bosses. More on our to-do lists than we could accomplish in three lifetimes. It’s easy for your needs to get buried underneath the rubble of daily life, and figuring out how to reconnect with your authentic self can feel touch and go… at best.

I wrote Needy: How to Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty to lovingly provide the space for you to better understand your needs, experiment with new habits that help you meet those needs each day, and build a resilient connection with yourself that you can rely upon for good.

You have needs—your needs matter. And yet, you’ve been taught that pushing your needs to the back burner is the only way to get things done, that your needs are an overwhelming burden, or that self-care is a luxury you can’t afford. But the presence of your needs is a fact and not a flaw. You can reclaim your energy and give yourself permission to take up space in the center of your own life.

In Needy, I share my unique approach to identifying, honoring, and advocating for the most tender and true parts of yourself that yearn to be acknowledged. It is an invitation to embody self-acceptance, which leads to meaningful growth in self-responsibility, self-care, self-trust, and self-love.

This book will be a delicious companion for your journey, but you actually can begin caring for yourself with greater tenderness and open communication right now.

I invite you to take the next three minutes to check in with yourself.

Put down your phone, close your computer, and put your hand on your heart.

Breath deeply into your belly and ask yourself:

How do I feel?

What do I need?

What does my body need from me?

What is ONE, doable need that I am ready, able, and willing to meet?

Real self-care is responsive, not prescriptive. The care you are aching for right now will be found in asking yourself those four questions. Give yourself permission to start with one, tangible action.

And repeat as necessary.

Need more? I will see you between the pages of Needy. I am so grateful to be able to share this book with you, and I hope you will share it with the humans in your life who struggle to take up space in this way.

xx Mara

Mara Glatzel, MSW, (she/her) is an intuitive coach, writer, and podcast host. She is a needy human who helps other needy humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy cycles. Her superpower is saying what you need to hear when you need to hear it, and she is here to help you believe in yourself as much as she believes in you. Find out more at maraglatzel.com.

Learn More
Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop | Sounds True

Mara Glatzel: What Do You Need?

We all have needs. Yet why is it so difficult to honor them? In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Mara Glatzel about her book, Needy: How to Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty, and how we might begin to answer the profound question: What happens when we take radical responsibility for our needs? 

Tune in for an empowering and indeed much-needed conversation about “giving ourselves permission to take up space in the center of our lives,” exploring: building a working vocabulary around needs and feelings, the disempowering stories we carry about what it means to have needs, the daily practice of identifying your needs, the harmful habit of consistently putting your needs aside, asking for the fullness of what you want, developing a strong self-partnership, shifting from people-pleasing to setting boundaries, Mara’s practice of “staying low and open and receptive,” self-care and “staying in the game,” making commitments that matter, knowing your job and their job when it comes to conversations about needs, the fallacy that one person alone can meet another’s vast and myriad needs, accessing your body’s intelligence, working in your inner landscape, sovereignty amid relationship and interdependency, the challenge of receiving everything you’re asking for, and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

The End of All-or-Nothing, Emergency Self-Care

What message are you giving to yourself when you wait until you’re in crisis before you begin caring for yourself? I used to be deeply entrenched in this pattern. I’d care for myself just enough so that I could be productive again and then get back to work until my next care emergency. I’d crash from striving and producing without a thought to my needs and then stop just long enough to treat myself just kindly enough to nurse myself back to health so that I could resume my breakneck speed.

Those days were exhilarating because even in my burnout I felt so purposeful, high on how good I was at pushing my needs aside to tackle whatever needed tackling. Exceptionally good in a crisis, I felt born for running myself into the ground and then picking up the pieces just enough to get back to work. Even as this pattern started to break down for me, I could feel my ego attachment to it. I was good at getting things done. I was good at helping others. I was good at putting everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. I was good. I was good. I was good.

The tricky thing about this pattern is that needs will get met one way or another. They don’t just vanish or disappear when you ignore them. They become rowdier and rowdier, nipping at your heels as you try to outrun them. Your body is infinitely wise and makes more noise as your ache for care compounds itself. When you ignore your needs long enough, you will be forced to prioritize yourself by circumstance, illness, or burnout, bringing you abruptly to the crisis point of having to slow down.

But even in the face of that, attending to the need for sustenance can sometimes still feel impossible if you are exhausted from a lifetime of holding it all together. While the need for sustenance might seem to come before rest, [in my book Needy] I ordered these chapters deliberately [“Rest” coming before “Sustenance”] because having the energy to start asking big questions about what you need requires energy too. You’re crumbling beneath the weight of your conditioned expectations for yourself and others, and you judge yourself for not being about to do it all without a thought for the energetic capacity necessary to prioritize joy, pleasure, or satiety.

You might think, Well if it’s right, it should feel good or it should be easy. But tending to your needs can be almost boring, and having the capacity to investigate the larger picture of what you are hungry for requires energy. It requires stamina and self-awareness to develop a healthy relationship with yourself after being in a dysfunctional relationship—one that’s chaotic, intense, familiar, thrilling, and compelling even when you know there is no way it will all work out in the long run. After a dramatic relationship like that, a relationship in which you are respectful of each other, loyal, trustworthy, and committed to each other can feel boring—but that kind of steadfast love heals and rebuilds a steady foundation of trust. The same is true for your relationship with yourself.

Self-love so often isn’t a flash-in-the-pan,
Instagram-worthy, wait-until-the-moment
is-perfect-and-the-stars-align kind of love.

It’s about showing up for yourself each and every day and doing what needs to be done. Maybe that’s resting. Maybe that’s calling your lawyer. Maybe that’s dealing with the window that is leaking and the moldy floorboards. Taking care of yourself is showing up for your relationship with yourself each day, asking what needs to be done and doing that to the best of your abilities.

It can be mundane, but as you begin making these shifts for your own sustenance, you might find yourself softening into a rhythm and routine of caring for yourself this way. 

There is a deliciousness in knowing you will be there when you need yourself. There is a sense of safety in the self-trust you build each time you choose not to abandon yourself. This work can be messy but also joyful, silly, sexy, creative, and playful. You might find yourself enjoying the celebration of infusing pleasure and sovereignty where there was none before.

And with time, you might realize that the purpose of your life is not to be good, productive, or approved by others. The purpose of your life is for YOU to live it. For you to take up space in your own thoughts and actions. For you to tend to your needs, devoting yourself to your own wholeness each and every day. For you to contribute to the world in the way that only you can. For you to love and be loved. For you to play. For your utter enjoyment and wholehearted pleasure. The purpose of your life is not to be nice and polite. It is for living—messily, humanly, in whatever way you feel is good and right for you.

Excerpted from Needy: How to Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty by Mara Glatzel.

Mara Glatzel, MSW, (she/her) is an intuitive coach, writer, and podcast host. She is a needy human who helps other needy humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy cycles. Her superpower is saying what you need to hear when you need to hear it, and she is here to help you believe in yourself as much as she believes in you. Find out more at maraglatzel.com.

Learn More
Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop | Sounds True

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  • Sustainable Healing: Ongoing, compassionate practice encourages emotional resilience and lasting mental clarity.

How Yoga Supports Mental And Emotional Well-Being

Yoga’s influence goes far beyond the physical body. For many, it serves as an anchor through emotional storms and mental overwhelm. To understand how yoga for mental health can become part of your healing journey, let’s explore its core contributions:

A Holistic Practice That Meets You Where You Are

Yoga isn’t just movement, it’s a conversation with your inner world. It brings together the breath, body, and mind to create space for awareness, without pressure to perform or change. In that space, emotional patterns can soften, revealing clarity beneath the noise.

Scientific Support For Emotional And Mental Relief

Research continues to affirm what many practitioners intuitively feel. Regular yoga practice has been shown to reduce stress hormones, increase calming brain chemicals like GABA, and regulate the nervous system. This makes it a gentle, sustainable approach to both yoga and mental health.

Emotional Balance Begins With Compassionate Awareness

One of the most powerful aspects of yoga for emotional balance is its ability to foster self-compassion. When we step onto the mat with whatever emotions are present: anxiety, grief, joy, or numbness, yoga teaches us how to stay connected without judgment. Over time, this builds emotional resilience rooted in presence rather than resistance.

From Temporary Relief To Lasting Inner Stability

The effects of yoga can feel subtle at first, but they ripple outward. A consistent practice doesn’t just offer short-term calm; it strengthens your ability to self-regulate and respond, not react. This is how inner healing yoga supports transformation from within, one breath at a time.

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The Science And Spirit Of Yoga For Mental Health

Yoga’s unique power lies in its ability to bridge ancient wisdom with modern understanding. While it has spiritual roots that invite deep introspection, it also holds measurable benefits for mental health. To fully appreciate the role of yoga in emotional and psychological well-being, it helps to look at both perspectives side by side:

What Modern Research Reveals

Scientific studies continue to explore the mental health benefits of yoga. Results point to improved mood, reduced anxiety and depression, and enhanced emotional regulation. These outcomes support the growing use of yoga for mental health in therapeutic settings, including trauma recovery and stress management.

Why The Subtle Body Matters

In yogic philosophy, healing isn’t limited to the physical or even the psychological. The concept of prana, or life force, helps explain why movement and breath can shift emotional states. Practices that work with subtle energy including inner healing yoga, help release stored tension and clear emotional blockages.

Balancing Effort And Surrender

Yoga invites a delicate interplay between strength and softness. In doing so, it mirrors the healing process itself: part discipline, part letting go. This balance nurtures the experience of mental clarity through yoga, creating the conditions for stillness to arise naturally.

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If you’re curious to deepen your connection to body and breath in a supported way, Sounds True offers a wide range of practices through yoga and movement. These digital programs are led by teachers who blend somatic wisdom with grounded guidance, meeting you right where you are.

Cultivating Emotional Balance Through Movement And Breath

Our emotions live in the body. They’re not just mental states but physical experiences, tightness in the chest, heaviness in the limbs, or fluttering in the gut. Yoga helps us move these feelings through instead of holding them in:

The Body As A Gateway To Emotional Awareness

Movement can unlock what words cannot. Through intentional poses, especially those that open the hips, heart, and spine, yoga supports the release of stored emotions. This is why yoga for emotional balance feels less like escape and more like a homecoming.

The Breath As Regulator And Messenger

Breathwork, or pranayama, is a powerful tool for emotional regulation. By consciously slowing the breath, we calm the nervous system and shift our state of mind. Over time, this supports both yoga and mental health by creating internal space for reflection rather than reaction.

Rhythmic Practice Builds Emotional Resilience

Consistency is key. Even short, daily practices help build the emotional strength needed to navigate life’s ups and downs. This steady rhythm reinforces the benefits of inner healing yoga, creating a supportive foundation for deeper personal work.

Supportive Tools For Emotional Healing

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Accessing Mental Clarity Through Yogic Presence

Mental clarity often feels just out of reach in a noisy world. Yoga creates the internal conditions that allow clarity to surface, not by forcing it, but by slowing things down. When the body is calm and the breath is steady, the mind can begin to clear:

Slowing Down To See Clearly

Yoga encourages us to pause and notice. Whether you’re holding a posture or sitting in stillness, these moments of mindful presence quiet the mental chatter. This process is central to experiencing mental clarity through yoga, where insights arise not from thinking harder but from thinking less.

Meditation And Stillness As Deep Practices

While movement helps discharge tension, meditation helps us see beneath it. Even a few minutes of seated awareness can reveal thought patterns and emotional loops we didn’t realize were there. These practices are integral to both yoga for mental health and long-term emotional wellness.

The Restorative Power Of Rest

Rest is not a luxury, it’s essential for mental clarity and nervous system repair. Deep rest practices like Yoga Nidra offer profound restoration. For an accessible entry point, explore yoga nidra—the sleep yoga, which gently guides you into deep states of awareness without effort.

Clarity As A Byproduct, Not A Goal

Yoga doesn’t chase clarity. It invites you to create the right internal environment and let clarity arise in its own time. Over time, this approach nurtures both inner healing yoga and sustainable mental clarity rooted in presence.

Inner Healing Yoga As A Path To Wholeness

Healing is not always about fixing what’s broken. Often, it’s about remembering what has always been whole beneath the layers of stress, pain, and disconnection. Inner healing yoga invites this remembering through intentional practice and self-inquiry:

Creating A Safe Space Within

The mat becomes a mirror. Each posture, breath, and moment of stillness offers a chance to meet yourself with honesty and care. This safe internal space nurtures the emotional awareness essential for lasting transformation.

The Power Of Self-Compassion

Yoga teaches us that healing is not linear. There will be days when the mind is foggy, the body is tense, or emotions feel overwhelming. Returning to your practice anyway builds trust, in yourself, and in the process of yoga for emotional balance.

Integration Beyond The Mat

The most meaningful shifts often happen after practice, in how we speak to ourselves, how we move through relationships, and how we respond to life. This is the deeper work of yoga and mental health, where practice becomes a lived experience of wholeness.

An Ongoing Invitation To Go Deeper

Inner healing is not a destination. It’s a continuous invitation to be in relationship with yourself as you are right now. As your awareness grows, so does your capacity for mental clarity through yoga, clarity rooted in self-understanding, not perfection.

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Final Thoughts

Yoga invites a return to ourselves. It doesn’t demand that we change who we are, but gently guides us to remember what already lives within us, clarity, calm, and connection. Whether you’re seeking stillness, release, or simply a moment to breathe, yoga offers the tools to support your healing from the inside out.

As you continue exploring the path of yoga for mental health, you may find that what once felt like emotional chaos begins to soften into something more spacious. With consistent practice, both yoga for emotional balance and inner healing yoga can become steady companions in your life. The clarity that arises is not forced but welcomed, cultivated through each breath, each pause, each mindful moment.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Yoga For Mental Health

What type of yoga is best for mental health?

Gentle, breath-focused styles like Hatha, Yin, and Restorative Yoga are especially beneficial for mental health, as they calm the nervous system and promote inner stillness.

Can yoga replace therapy or medication for mental health conditions?

Yoga can be a powerful complement to therapy or medication, but it is not a substitute. Always consult a healthcare provider for individualized treatment plans.

How often should I practice yoga for mental health benefits?

Even 10 to 20 minutes daily can support mental and emotional wellness. Consistency matters more than intensity when it comes to cultivating inner balance.

Is it normal to feel emotional during or after yoga practice?

Yes, emotions can rise during yoga as physical movement and breathwork unlock stored tension. This is part of the body’s natural release and healing process.

Can beginners benefit from yoga for mental clarity and emotional healing?

Absolutely. No advanced skill is needed to start. Breath awareness, simple movements, and mindful rest can offer noticeable benefits, even for beginners.

What role does community play in yoga for mental health?

Practicing in community, whether in-person or online, can enhance feelings of support and connection. Shared practice helps reduce isolation and deepens healing.

How does yoga support nervous system regulation?

Yoga helps activate the parasympathetic nervous system through slow breathing and mindful movement, promoting a state of rest, recovery, and emotional stability.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator’s Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.

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