Pema Chödrön: “Compassionate Abiding”

    —
May 26, 2020

Pema Chödrön: “Compassionate Abiding”

Pema Chödrön May 26, 2020

How do we find a sense of stability when everything seems so groundless? Pema Chödrön is celebrated around the world for her ability to help us turn toward things that are difficult and embrace our uncertainty. In this week’s podcast, Pema joins Tami to share her one-of-a-kind guidance, including a special practice she calls “compassionate abiding.” Tami and Pema also talk about how to stay embodied when panic arises, accessing the wisdom inherent in our emotions, and the importance of cultivating “unconditional friendship” and befriending even those parts of ourselves that we want to reject.

Pema Chödrön is a well-known and beloved American-born Buddhist nun and author of many spiritual classics. She serves as the resident teacher at Gampo Abbey Monastery in Nova Scotia and is a student of Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche and the late Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche. For more information, including a list of her published works, visit pemachodronfoundation.org.

Author photo © Christine Alicino

600 Podcasts and Counting…

Subscribe to Insights at the Edge to hear all of Tami’s interviews (transcripts available too!), featuring Eckhart Tolle, Caroline Myss, Tara Brach, Jack Kornfield, Adyashanti, and many more.

Meet Your Host: Tami Simon

Founded Sounds True in 1985 as a multimedia publishing house with a mission to disseminate spiritual wisdom. She hosts a popular weekly podcast called Insights at the Edge, where she has interviewed many of today's leading teachers. Tami lives with her wife, Julie M. Kramer, and their two spoodles, Rasberry and Bula, in Boulder, Colorado.

Photo © Jason Elias

Also By Author

Pema Chödrön: “Compassionate Abiding”

How do we find a sense of stability when everything seems so groundless? Pema Chödrön is celebrated around the world for her ability to help us turn toward things that are difficult and embrace our uncertainty. In this week’s podcast, Pema joins Tami to share her one-of-a-kind guidance, including a special practice she calls “compassionate abiding.” Tami and Pema also talk about how to stay embodied when panic arises, accessing the wisdom inherent in our emotions, and the importance of cultivating “unconditional friendship” and befriending even those parts of ourselves that we want to reject.

Pema Chödrön: Living with Vulnerability

Pema Chödrön is an American-born Buddhist nun who currently resides at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia. Her many publications include How to Meditate, Getting Unstuck, and Fail, Fail Again, Fail Better. This special episode of Insights at the Edge—originally broadcast as part of the Living with Vulnerability online program—features a deeply heartfelt conversation between Pema and Tami Simon. Here they discuss why it can feel so hard to live with your innermost self open to the world. Pema emphasizes that choosing to be vulnerable brings a more genuine and fulfilling experience of your daily life. Finally, Tami and Pema talk about listening to the inherent lessons of your emotions and why acceptance of the moment will open you to ever-greater opportunities for joy and enrichment.(66 minutes)

The Freedom to Choose Something Different with Pema Ch...

Ever feel triggered and stuck in a reactive tailspin despite all your efforts? It is from this place — this hooked feeling — that we find ourselves responding in less than ideal ways. These are the moments when we may speak with venom, act out, or completely shut down when faced with challenging situations.

It is only later, when we’ve had the opportunity to calm down and reflect on our actions, that we wonder where we went wrong and how we could have chosen a more grounded response.

In The Freedom to Choose Something Different, Pema Chödrön examines and illuminates this nebulous process, clearly identifying where and when you have the opportunity to change your habitual response patterns. . . to choose something different. In this eight-part video course, Pema personally walks you through the landscape of these internal thunderstorms and guides you through the tools to cultivate inner freedom.

Discover more in the FREE introduction to the Online Course.

You Might Also Enjoy

Elizabeth Stanley on Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness: Whe...

Meditation is often understood as a way to find calm by turning inward. Yet for many people, that inward focus can feel overwhelming instead of grounding. The body may tighten, emotions may rise quickly, or the mind may feel harder to settle. These responses are not a sign of failure. They reflect how the nervous system holds and processes past experiences. Trauma sensitive mindfulness offers a way to approach awareness with more care, allowing space for safety, pacing, and choice.

At Sounds True, we have spent decades sharing the living wisdom of teachers who speak to real human experience with honesty and depth. Through voices like Elizabeth Stanley, we bring forward teachings that integrate science, mindfulness, and compassion, offering practices that support meaningful and lasting inner growth.

Here, we look at trauma sensitive mindfulness through Elizabeth Stanley’s perspective, including why meditation is not always enough and how a more supportive approach can help.

Key Takeaways:

  • Nervous System Awareness: Trauma sensitive mindfulness centers on regulating the body, not just observing thoughts
  • Flexible Practice: Meditation can include movement, choice, and external focus to support safety
  • Healing Approach: Awareness becomes effective when paired with pacing, care, and nervous system support

Awaken Your Inner Healing Power with Guided Practices by Sounds True

What Is Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness and How It Differs from Traditional Mindfulness

Trauma sensitive mindfulness begins with a simple truth. The present moment does not feel safe for everyone. Turning inward can bring up intense sensations or emotions, and traditional mindfulness does not always account for how trauma shapes this experience.

This approach offers a gentler entry point. It considers how the body responds before asking it to be still. Instead of pushing through discomfort, it allows for choice, movement, and grounding.

Mindfulness then becomes less about doing it right and more about building a relationship with our experience. We learn to notice what feels supportive, pause when needed, and meet ourselves with care.

Elizabeth Stanley’s Approach to Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness and Healing

Elizabeth Stanley’s work brings clarity to why trauma sensitive mindfulness matters and how it can be practiced in a way that truly supports healing. Her perspective is grounded in both research and lived experience, creating a bridge between science and personal transformation.

Her Background in Trauma and Resilience

Stanley’s background includes years of studying resilience under extreme stress, alongside her own journey through trauma recovery. She emphasizes that resilience is not simply about mental strength. It is about the capacity of the nervous system to return to balance after disruption.

Through trauma sensitive mindfulness, she highlights how this capacity can be strengthened over time. The practice becomes less about observing thoughts and more about learning how to stay connected to the body without becoming overwhelmed.

The Limits of Traditional Mindfulness Practices

In her teaching, Stanley also speaks to the limitations of traditional mindfulness approaches. Many practices assume that the body can tolerate sustained attention. For someone carrying unresolved trauma, that assumption may not hold true.

Trauma sensitive mindfulness acknowledges that awareness alone is not always enough. Without support, attention can amplify distress rather than ease it. By integrating regulation and pacing, this approach creates a more supportive path that allows mindfulness to unfold gradually.

Why Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Changes the Way We Practice Meditation

When we begin to understand mindfulness through the lens of trauma sensitivity, the practice itself starts to shift. Meditation is no longer about holding attention in one place at all costs. It becomes a responsive and adaptive experience.

Meditation Through the Lens of Trauma Sensitivity

In trauma sensitive mindfulness, meditation can include a wide range of options. A person might keep their eyes open, shift their focus between internal and external awareness, or engage in gentle movement. These choices are not distractions from the practice. They are part of the practice.

This flexibility helps create a sense of stability. It allows the practitioner to remain engaged without pushing beyond their capacity.

Creating Safety Within the Practice

Safety is not treated as an outcome. It is the foundation. Trauma sensitive mindfulness invites us to notice when something feels supportive and when it does not. That noticing becomes a form of guidance.

Over time, this builds trust. The practitioner begins to feel that they can stay present without losing themselves in the experience. Meditation then becomes a space where healing can happen at a natural pace.

When Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Is Needed Beyond Standard Meditation

There are times when traditional mindfulness practices may not provide the support someone needs. Trauma sensitive mindfulness helps us recognize those moments with clarity and care.

Recognizing Signs That Mindfulness Alone Is Not Enough

Some people notice that meditation brings up anxiety, numbness, or a sense of disconnection. Others may feel flooded by emotion or unable to stay grounded. These experiences are not signs of failure. They are signals from the nervous system.

Trauma sensitive mindfulness encourages us to respond to these signals rather than push through them.

Expanding Beyond Stillness Into Regulation

In these moments, the practice may shift. Instead of remaining still, a person might focus on their surroundings, engage in movement, or connect with a steady rhythm like walking or breathing with sound.

These forms of regulation help restore balance. They create a pathway back to presence that feels supportive rather than overwhelming.

Discover the Hidden Power of Daily Meditation

The Role of the Nervous System in Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Practice

Trauma sensitive mindfulness recognizes that the nervous system plays a central role in how we experience awareness. Before we can rest in presence, the body needs to sense that it is safe enough to do so.

  • The nervous system constantly interprets signals of safety and threat, often outside of conscious awareness
  • Trauma can leave the body in patterns of activation or shutdown that shape how mindfulness feels
  • Trauma sensitive mindfulness introduces gentle ways to support regulation before deep attention is invited
  • Small moments of ease help the nervous system learn that presence can be safe
  • Choice allows the practitioner to stay connected without feeling trapped in the experience

As these patterns begin to shift, mindfulness becomes more accessible. The body no longer experiences awareness as something to defend against. Instead, it becomes a place where steadiness can grow.

How to Practice Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Safely and Effectively

Practicing trauma sensitive mindfulness begins with a willingness to move at the pace of the body. There is no need to force stillness or sustain attention beyond what feels manageable. Instead, we begin by noticing what feels supportive in the moment.

This might include grounding attention in the senses, feeling the contact of the body with a chair, or simply noticing the environment. At times, it may mean stepping away from internal awareness and focusing outward. These choices are not interruptions. They are expressions of care.

Over time, this approach builds a sense of trust. The practitioner learns that they can engage with mindfulness without becoming overwhelmed. Safety becomes something that is felt, not something that is assumed. From this foundation, awareness can deepen in a way that feels steady and sustainable.

Bringing Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness into Daily Life and Relationships

Trauma sensitive mindfulness does not remain confined to formal practice. It naturally extends into daily life. It can be present in the way we pause before responding, in how we notice tension in the body, or in the decision to take a moment of rest.

In relationships, this awareness can create space. Instead of reacting automatically, we begin to sense what is happening within us. This allows for more thoughtful responses and a greater sense of connection.

These small moments matter. They reflect a shift from striving to be present toward allowing presence to emerge. In this way, mindfulness becomes integrated into the rhythm of everyday life.

Building Resilience Through Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness Over Time

Resilience develops gradually. It is shaped through repeated experiences of safety, awareness, and regulation. Trauma sensitive mindfulness supports this process by honoring the body’s natural pace.

Each moment of grounded awareness strengthens the nervous system’s capacity to remain present. Over time, this creates a sense of stability that can hold a wider range of experiences.

This path is not about reaching a fixed state. It is about developing a relationship with ourselves that is steady, responsive, and compassionate. Through trauma sensitive mindfulness, we begin to discover that presence is not something we force. It is something that becomes possible as the body learns it is safe to be here.

Learn How your Mind Really Works with Sounds True

Final Thoughts

Trauma sensitive mindfulness invites a more compassionate way of being present. Rather than pushing through discomfort, it encourages us to listen to the body and move at a pace that feels supportive.

Elizabeth Stanley’s insights remind us that awareness and regulation go hand in hand. As we honor both, mindfulness becomes a steady, healing practice that meets us exactly where we are.

Frequently Asked Questions About Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness

What makes trauma sensitive mindfulness different from trauma informed care?

Trauma sensitive mindfulness is a specific approach within the broader framework of trauma informed care. While trauma informed care can apply to many fields, such as healthcare or education, trauma sensitive mindfulness focuses directly on how mindfulness practices are adapted to support nervous system safety and regulation.

Can trauma sensitive mindfulness be practiced without a teacher?

Yes, it can be practiced individually, especially with gentle awareness and self-guided pacing. However, some people benefit from working with a trained practitioner who understands trauma and can offer guidance when difficult experiences arise.

Is trauma sensitive mindfulness suitable for beginners?

Yes, it is often more accessible for beginners because it emphasizes choice and flexibility. Instead of requiring strict focus, it allows people to ease into awareness in a way that feels manageable.

How long does it take to see benefits from trauma sensitive mindfulness?

The experience varies from person to person. Some may notice small shifts in awareness and calm within a short time, while bigger changes in resilience and regulation tend to develop gradually through consistent practice.

Can trauma sensitive mindfulness replace therapy?

It is not a replacement for therapy, especially for those working through significant trauma. It can be a supportive complement to therapeutic work, helping individuals build awareness and regulation skills alongside professional support.

What types of practices are included in trauma sensitive mindfulness?

Practices may include grounding exercises, sensory awareness, gentle movement, and flexible attention techniques. The focus is on what supports stability rather than following a fixed method.

How does trauma sensitive mindfulness support physical well-being?

By helping regulate the nervous system, this approach can reduce chronic stress responses in the body. Over time, this may support improved sleep, reduced tension, and a greater sense of ease.

Is it normal to feel discomfort during trauma sensitive mindfulness?

Some discomfort can arise, especially when becoming more aware of internal experiences. The key difference is that this approach encourages responding to discomfort with care, rather than pushing through it.

Can trauma sensitive mindfulness be practiced in short moments?

Yes, it is well suited for brief, everyday moments. Even a few seconds of grounding or awareness can support regulation and help build consistency over time.

Who can benefit most from trauma sensitive mindfulness?

Anyone can benefit, but it is especially supportive for individuals who find traditional meditation challenging or overwhelming. It offers an alternative path that honors personal capacity.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator's Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.

Mirabai Starr on Ordinary Mysticism: Finding the Sacre...

What if the sacred is not something distant, but something quietly present in everyday life? Ordinary mysticism invites us to notice moments of connection, stillness, and even challenge as meaningful. Through Mirabai Starr’s perspective, mysticism spirituality becomes simple and human, grounded in awareness and the experience of being fully present.

We have spent decades sharing the voices of trusted spiritual teachers and preserving their teachings in their most authentic form. Our work centers on offering living wisdom that supports real transformation and makes spiritual insight accessible to all.

Here, we look at ordinary mysticism, the everyday sacred, and how mysticism, spirituality, and the dark night soul meaning unfold in daily life.

Key Takeaways:

  • Everyday Sacred: Ordinary moments hold spiritual depth when met with presence and awareness.
  • Mysticism Spirituality: Spiritual experience is lived through connection, not limited to tradition.
  • Inner Transformation: Even the dark night soul’s meaning supports growth and deeper understanding.

Awaken Your Inner Healing Power with Guided Practices by Sounds True

Ordinary Mysticism with Mirabai Starr and Mysticism Spirituality

We share living wisdom through the authentic voices of spiritual teachers. In this conversation with Mirabai Starr, ordinary mysticism is revealed as a lived experience, grounded in presence and found within everyday life.

Ordinary mysticism does not require stepping away from daily responsibilities. It recognizes the sacred within each moment, expressed through connection, reflection, and the natural rhythms of being.

This approach reflects a heart-led, accessible path where spirituality is not distant, but something we experience through awareness, honesty, and presence.

Mirabai Starr on Ordinary Mysticism and the Everyday Sacred

Ordinary mysticism begins by noticing the sacred within everyday life. Mirabai Starr invites a simple shift toward presence and awareness.

Recognizing the Everyday Sacred in Simple Moments

The sacred appears in quiet, ordinary moments when we slow down and pay attention. These experiences reveal depth within daily life.

Letting Go of the Need for Extraordinary Spiritual Experiences

Spiritual life does not depend on dramatic experiences. Ordinary mysticism values presence in what is already here.

Exploring Mysticism Spirituality Through the Everyday Sacred

Mysticism spirituality is often associated with distant traditions or specialized practices. Yet within this conversation, it is presented as something deeply accessible, grounded in the shared human experience of connection and awareness.

Mysticism Spirituality Across Traditions and Teachings

Mirabai Starr draws from a wide range of spiritual lineages, yet her approach remains inclusive and open. Mysticism spirituality is not confined to a single belief system. It is a universal thread that runs through many traditions, pointing toward direct experience of the sacred.

This perspective allows us to engage with teachings in a way that feels personal rather than prescriptive. The focus shifts from adherence to doctrine toward an embodied understanding. What matters is not the form the teaching takes, but the depth of connection it invites.

In this way, mysticism spirituality becomes a bridge. It connects different paths through a shared recognition of presence, love, and awareness. It invites us to honor the diversity of spiritual expression while recognizing the common ground beneath it.

Making the Everyday Sacred a Spiritual Practice

The everyday sacred becomes a form of practice when we bring intention and awareness to our actions. Simple activities begin to take on new depth when approached with presence. Preparing a meal, listening fully to another person, or stepping outside for a moment of stillness can all become expressions of ordinary mysticism.

This kind of practice does not require additional time or elaborate structure. It is integrated into the flow of daily life. What changes is not the activity itself, but the quality of attention we bring to it.

Over time, this approach begins to reshape our relationship with experience. We become more attuned to subtle shifts, more responsive to what is unfolding, and more connected to the sense of sacredness that permeates even the simplest moments.

The Dark Night Soul Meaning in Ordinary Mysticism and Spiritual Growth

Spiritual life is not limited to moments of clarity or peace. It also includes periods of uncertainty, loss, and disorientation. Within ordinary mysticism, these experiences are not seen as interruptions but as essential parts of the journey.

Understanding the Dark Night Soul Meaning

The dark night soul meaning refers to a phase in which familiar structures begin to fall away. What once provided a sense of stability may no longer feel reliable. This can create a sense of emptiness or confusion, as if the ground beneath us is shifting.

In mysticism and spirituality, this experience is understood as a process of transformation. It invites us to release attachments and assumptions that no longer serve us. While it can feel challenging, it also opens space for a deeper and more authentic connection to emerge.

Mirabai Starr speaks to this phase with compassion and honesty. She acknowledges the difficulty while also recognizing the potential it holds. The dark night is not something to be avoided. It is something to be met with presence.

Transformation Through Grief and Uncertainty

Grief often plays a central role in the dark night experience. It can arise from loss, change, or the recognition that something important has shifted. Within ordinary mysticism, grief is not something to be pushed aside. It is something to be felt fully.

By allowing grief to move through us, we begin to access a deeper layer of awareness. There is a kind of clarity that emerges when we stop resisting what is present. The everyday sacred becomes visible even within difficulty.

This transformation is not immediate. It unfolds gradually, shaped by patience and willingness. As we remain present to uncertainty, we begin to discover a quiet resilience that supports us through the process.

Discover the Hidden Power of Daily Meditation

Mirabai Starr on the Everyday Sacred and Mysticism Spirituality

Ordinary mysticism is lived through small, consistent acts of awareness and care. Mirabai Starr offers simple yet meaningful ways to remain connected to the everyday sacred within mysticism and spirituality.

  • Presence serves as the foundation. Returning attention to the breath and the body allows us to anchor ourselves in what is real and immediate.
  • Deep listening opens space for genuine connection. When we listen without interruption or judgment, we create room for something sacred to emerge.
  • Devotion appears in daily actions. Acts of kindness, care, and attentiveness become expressions of spiritual practice.
  • Emotional honesty supports growth. Allowing feelings to arise without suppression creates space for deeper understanding.
  • Returning to awareness again and again strengthens the practice. Each moment offers a new opportunity to reconnect with the everyday sacred.

These practices reflect a grounded and compassionate approach to mysticism and spirituality. They remind us that the path is not about achieving perfection but about staying present to life as it unfolds. In this way, the sacred becomes something we live with rather than something we seek outside ourselves.

Ordinary Mysticism, the Everyday Sacred, and Inner Transformation

Inner transformation within ordinary mysticism unfolds through attention and openness. It is not defined by dramatic change but by a gradual deepening of awareness. As we begin to recognize the everyday sacred, we also begin to notice patterns within ourselves.

Mirabai Starr’s teachings encourage a gentle approach to this process. Rather than trying to fix or change what we see, we are invited to meet it with curiosity. This creates space for insight to arise naturally. Over time, this way of relating begins to shift how we experience ourselves and others.

Mysticism spirituality, in this sense, is not about becoming something new. It is about uncovering what has always been present. The layers that once obscured our awareness begin to soften, revealing a deeper sense of connection and presence.

Understanding the Dark Night Soul Meaning in Mysticism and Spirituality

The dark night soul’s meaning is not limited to a single experience. It can appear in different forms throughout life, each time inviting a deeper level of surrender. Within mysticism and spirituality, this process is understood as part of ongoing growth.

During these periods, the everyday sacred may feel less visible. There can be a sense of distance or disconnection. Yet even in these moments, something remains. A quiet presence continues beneath the surface.

Learning to trust this presence becomes an important part of the path. It requires patience and a willingness to remain open, even when clarity is not immediately available. Over time, this trust begins to deepen, supporting a more grounded and resilient sense of being.

Living Ordinary Mysticism Through the Everyday Sacred with Mirabai Starr

Living ordinary mysticism is a practice of returning to the present moment through awareness and intention. The everyday sacred offers ongoing opportunities to reconnect, wherever we are.

Mirabai Starr’s teachings show that mysticism and spirituality unfold within daily life, expressed through how we listen, respond, and care.

Ordinary mysticism invites a way of living rooted in presence, compassion, and connection, where the sacred is found within each moment.

Learn How your Mind Really Works with Sounds True

Final Thoughts

Ordinary mysticism invites us to recognize the sacred within everyday life. Through presence and openness, even moments of challenge and the dark night soul, meaning becomes part of a deeper unfolding.

Over time, the sacred is no longer something distant. It becomes the way we live and experience each moment.

Frequently Asked Questions About Ordinary Mysticism

What is ordinary mysticism in simple terms?

Ordinary mysticism refers to experiencing the sacred within everyday life rather than seeking it in rare or extraordinary moments. It emphasizes awareness, presence, and connection in daily experiences.

How is ordinary mysticism different from traditional mysticism?

Traditional mysticism is often associated with formal practices or religious frameworks. Ordinary mysticism focuses on direct, lived experience and does not require adherence to a specific tradition.

Who is Mirabai Starr, and why is she relevant to this topic?

Mirabai Starr is a contemporary spiritual teacher and author known for making mystical teachings accessible. Her work emphasizes compassion, interspiritual understanding, and embodied spirituality.

Can anyone practice ordinary mysticism?

Yes, ordinary mysticism is accessible to anyone. It does not depend on background, belief system, or level of experience, only a willingness to be present and attentive.

How does mysticism spirituality relate to daily routines?

Mysticism spirituality can be integrated into daily routines by bringing awareness to ordinary actions such as listening, working, or resting, turning them into moments of connection.

What role does silence play in ordinary mysticism?

Silence creates space for awareness and reflection. It allows individuals to notice subtle experiences and deepen their connection to the present moment.

Is ordinary mysticism connected to any religion?

It can be found within many religious traditions, but it is not limited to any single one. It is a universal approach to experiencing the sacred.

How does the dark night soul’s meaning relate to personal growth?

The dark night soul meaning reflects periods of inner difficulty that can lead to deeper understanding, emotional resilience, and spiritual maturity.

What are some signs of experiencing the everyday sacred?

Signs may include a sense of calm, deeper appreciation for simple moments, increased empathy, and a feeling of connection with others and the environment.

Can ordinary mysticism support mental and emotional well-being?

Yes, by encouraging presence and acceptance, ordinary mysticism can help reduce stress, improve emotional awareness, and support a more grounded sense of well-being.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator's Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.

nico and devon hase: Buddhist Volcanoes In Love


What if everything you believed about a healthy relationship—the harmony, the peace, the perfectly matched wheels—was the very thing getting in the way?

This week, Tami Simon speaks with nico and devon hase—married Buddhist teachers, longtime meditation practitioners, and co-authors of the new Sounds True book This Messy, Gorgeous Love: A Buddhist Guide to Lasting Partnership—about what it actually takes to build a partnership that transforms rather than just endures.

Join Tami, nico, and devon to explore:

  • Why relationships are inherently rough—and why accepting that is the first act of real intimacy
  • The three conflict styles (volcanoes, diplomats, and dodgers) and how to work skillfully with your own
  • The tightrope principle: why lasting partnership means always finding your balance, never holding it
  • The daily check-in practice nico and devon discovered during three years of solitary retreat—and why it’s deceptively powerful
  • How death contemplation can dissolve petty resentments and bring fierce clarity to what actually matters
  • The “third space” in relationship: listening to the partnership itself as its own living being
  • Body shame, shifting desire, and sexuality as an awakening path—from devon’s own retreat discoveries
  • Why bodhichitta—the awakened heart of service—might be the most honest metric for whether a relationship is worth tending

Whether you’re navigating a decades-long partnership or wondering if intimacy and spiritual depth can coexist at all, nico and devon offer both radical honesty and genuine hope.

Listen now →

This conversation offers genuine transmission—not just concepts about awakening, but the palpable presence of realized teachers exploring the growing edge of spiritual understanding together. Originally aired on Sounds True One.

This episode is sponsored by Omega Institute, a global gathering hub for lifelong learning and spiritual exploration. Located in upstate New York’s beautiful Hudson Valley, Omega offers weekend workshops, special events, rest and rejuvenation retreats, professional trainings, online learning, and more. Discover what calls to you at eomega.org/true.