Robert Augustus Masters: True Masculine Power

January 20, 2015

Robert Augustus Masters: True Masculine Power

Robert Augustus Masters January 20, 2015

Robert Augustus Masters is an integral psychotherapist and spiritual teacher whose work emphasizes physical embodiment and greater relational maturity. With Sounds True, he has published the book To Be a Man: A Guide to True Masculine Power. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Robert and Tami Simon talk about the deep shame that men often experience in a society that encourages them to “man up” and ignore their emotions. They also speak on developing a healthier approach to anger, as well as coming to a new understanding of masculine sexuality. Finally, they discuss Robert’s interpretation of what women truly need from modern men. (68 minutes)

Robert Augustus Masters, PhD, is an integral psychotherapist, relationship expert, and spiritual teacher whose work blends the psychological and physical with the spiritual, emphasizing embodiment, emotional literacy, and the development of relational maturity. He is the author of thirteen books, including Transformation through Intimacy and Spiritual Bypassing. For more information, visit robertmasters.com

Author photo © Diane Bardwell Masters

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How to Bring Your Fear Out of Your Shadow

How To Bring Fear Out Of Your Shadow Header ImageIf you’re looking for genuine transformation, you need look no further than your fear. For in it there exists not only an abundance of trapped energy, but also the very testing and challenge that we need in order to live a deeper, more authentic life.

The dragon’s cave awaits. However shadowed it may be, you know where it is, and you can see it more clearly as you move toward it, step by conscious step, bringing the fearful you into your heart, with your adrenaline not so much fueling your fear as your courage and investigative excitement.

The following guide can help you confront the dragons of fear as you navigate through your own unique shadow.

Get to know your fear. Study it, approach it, become more curious about it, turn on the lights. Get to know it even better. Go for an inside look at it, paying close attention to all of its qualities, static and otherwise. The more familiar you are with your fear, the less the chances are of you letting it control you.

Get to know its roots. The expression of your fear might be outside your shadow, but its origins, its foundational roots, may be in your shadow. You may, for example, begin with an obvious case of worrying and then drop below that to an anxiety that has been with you since you were young. Underlying that may be a survival-based panic that’s anchored in an even earlier time. Spelunk your depths.

Stop shaming yourself for being afraid. Everyone has fear, whether they admit it or not. The Dalai Lama has said he sometimes feels anxious. The more we shame ourselves—and are shamed—for being afraid, the more our fear will be driven into our shadow. Fear is natural, but what we do with it may not be so natural, such as when we pathologize it.

Open your heart to the frightened child in you. Develop as much compassion as possible for the fearful you. (This compassion comes from the you who is not caught in fear.) Don’t tell that child not to be afraid or that there’s nothing to be afraid of. Instead, be caring and protective enough to hold such fearfulness the same way you would a trembling infant. Remember that as a child you needed not just love but also protection. Being a good parent to your inner child will decentralize your fear so that instead of it holding you, you are holding it.

Instead of giving your fear higher walls, give it bigger pastures. Doing so expands you. This makes more room for your fear to shed some of its constrictedness and transition into excitement, allowing you more access to contexts other than that of fearfulness. Fear contracts our breathing, squeezing and gripping us, as if we’re stuck in a too-small enclosure, unpleasantly walled in. Giving our fear more room, more space, doesn’t make it worse but rather spreads out its energies, diluting its intensity and reducing the pressure.

Think of your fear as excitement in disguise. Where there’s fear, there’s excitement close by. Make a hard fist, tightly balled up, and imagine this is your fear. Then relax your hand, letting your fingers spread wide; this is your excitement, open and available. It’s the same energy, the same adrenaline, but the context has shifted dramatically. You weren’t trying to get excited; simply relaxing your fist freed up your energy. The fear initially is tightly held in the shadows; making conscious contact with it allows it to begin uncurling, to let some light in.

Keep your anger on tap. Take advantage of the fact that fear and anger are very closely related, being basically the same biochemically. Where fear contracts us, anger expands us, for better or worse. In fear we either tend to flee or freeze; we often feel paralyzed. But in anger we thrust forward, leaning into what angers us; our energies mobilize for taking strong stands. Some anger is a mask for fear, but plenty of anger is fearless fire, flaming through relational deadwood and obstacles to well-being, providing a torch that can illuminate even the darkest corners of our shadow.

Separate the content of your fear from its energy. When fear gets into our mind, we spin out storylines that can keep us in dark places internally, thought-cages packed with fearful ideas and expectations. When this happens, don’t think about your fear. Instead, bring your awareness as fully as possible to your body. Sense where in your body the energy of fear is strongest, taking note of the sensations there and their detailing. Stay with this body awareness, sensing instead of thinking, until you feel more stability. Soften your belly and chest, feeling how your breathing moves your entire torso, keeping some awareness on the arrival and departure of each breath.

Practice courage. Courage doesn’t mean we’re fearless but that we’re going ahead regardless of whatever fear we’re feeling. Start with small acts of courage, doing things that are a bit scary, a bit daunting. This could mean having a cold shower when you’re feeling overly sluggish, or saying no to a lunch date with a friend who you know you’ll find draining to be around today. Honor your everyday courage; sometimes getting out of bed asks more from us than does parachuting from a plane.

As you practice courage, more and more of your fearfulness will shift into resolve and action. Some of it may remain, keeping you on your toes. And some of it may morph into the kind of anger that helps fuel needed stands. Remember that practicing courage helps immensely in facing and entering your shadow.

Excerpted from Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark: Breaking Free from the Hidden Forces That Drive You by Robert Augustus Masters.

Robert Augustus MastersRobert Augustus Masters, PhD, is an integral psychotherapist, relationship expert, and spiritual teacher whose work blends the psychological and physical with the spiritual, emphasizing embodiment, emotional literacy, and the development of relational maturity. He is the author of thirteen books, including Transformation through Intimacy and Spiritual Bypassing. For more information, visit robertmasters.com.

Buy your copy of Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark at your favorite bookseller!

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What Causes Reactivity and How to Navigate it Skillful...

What Causes Reactivity Header Image

Our shadow-bound conditioning shows itself most often through reactivity. When we’re reactive, we’re automatically reverting to and acting out conditioned behavior, usually in ways that are emotionally disproportionate to what’s warranted in a given situation.

Reactivity is the knee-jerk dramatization of activated shadow material. Self-justifying and far from self-reflective, reactivity features a very predictable take on what’s going on, which we proceed with even if we know better.

The signs of reactivity include:

An exaggerated attachment to being right. If someone points out this attachment to us when we’re being reactive, it usually only amplifies our righteousness.

Emotional distortion and/or overload. More often than not, this behavior gets quite melodramatic. We may use emotional intensity to back up what we’re doing.

Using the same words and ideas from previous times we’ve been triggered. It’s as if we’re on stage saying our lines as dictated by the same old script. We’re acting and re-acting, even when we know we’re doing so.

A lack of—or an opposition to—self-reflection. The refusal to step back, even just a bit, from what’s happening fuels the continuation of our reactivity.

A loss of connection with whomever we’re upset with. Our heart closes.

A loss of connection with our core. We’re immersed instead in our reactivity.

Here’s an example of how to skillfully—and nonreactively—handle reactivity. Imagine you’re embroiled in a reactive argument with your partner or a close friend. You’re dangerously close to making a decision about your relationship to them that you vaguely sense you’ll later regret, but damned if you’re going to hold back now! After all, don’t you have a right to be heard?

Things are getting very edgy. Then, rather than continuing your righteous, over-the-top dramatics, you admit to yourself that you’re being reactive. Period. You step back just a bit from all the sound, fury, and pressure to make a decision about your relationship with this person. You’re still churning inside, but the context has shifted. You’re starting to make some space for the reactive you instead of continuing to identify with it. There’s no dissociation here — just a dose of healthy separation, some degree of holding space for yourself, perhaps even some trace of emerging care for the other person.

On the outside, you’re slowing down and ceasing to attack the other, saying nothing more than what you’re feeling, without blaming the other for this. You’re starting to allow yourself to be vulnerable with the other. You’re interrupting your own reactivity.

Your intuition begins to shine through all the fuss. You start to realize that, while you were being reactive, your voice sounded much like it did when you were seven or eight years old. The same desperation, the same drivenness, the same cadence. You were hurting considerably then and trying to keep your hurt out of sight, because earlier times of expressing it had been met with parental rejection and shaming.

You’re still on shaky ground, though, and could still easily slip back into your reactive stance. Just one more shaming or otherwise unskillful comment from the other could do the trick. So you soften your jaw and belly, bend your knees slightly, and take five deep breaths, making sure that you count each breath on the exhale. You know from previous experience that these somatic adjustments will help settle you; they are your go-to calming responses for stressful moments.

As the out-front reality of your reactivity is now in clear sight, you feel shame. Some of this is a beneficial shame, activating your conscience, letting you know that you crossed a line with the other and that a genuine expression of remorse is fitting. You say you’re sorry, with obvious vulnerability. Sadness surfaces in you. You don’t make excuses for your reactivity. Instead, you make your connection with the other more important than being right.

And a very different kind of shame also arises, one that’s far from beneficial. This shame activates not your conscience but your inner critic (heartlessly negative self-appraisal). It’s aimed not at your behavior but at your very being, taking the form of self-flagellation for having slipped—a self-condemnation that, if allowed to run free, mires you in guilt and keeps you from reconnecting with the other. You acknowledge the presence of this toxic shame, saying to yourself that your inner critic is present. It’s not nearly as strong as it usually is, fading quickly as you name it. You choose to address it in depth later on, outside of the argument you were just having, as part of your ongoing shadow work. Reconnecting with the other is a priority now, and it’s happening, bringing relief and gratitude to you both.

Excerpted from Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark: Breaking Free from the Hidden Forces That Drive You by Robert Augustus Masters.

Robert Augustus Masters

Robert Augustus Masters, PhD, is an integral psychotherapist, relationship expert, and spiritual teacher whose work blends the psychological and physical with the spiritual, emphasizing embodiment, emotional literacy, and the development of relational maturity. He is the author of thirteen books, including Transformation through Intimacy and Spiritual Bypassing. For more information, visit robertmasters.com.

Buy your copy of Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark at your favorite bookseller!

Sounds True | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Indiebound

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Causes Reactivity Pinterest

Robert Augustus Masters: The Depthless Depth of Shadow...

Robert Augustus Masters is an integral psychotherapist and author whose works include To Be a Man, Emotional Intimacy, and Spiritual Bypassing. Most recently, he teamed with Sounds True to publish Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark: Breaking Free from the Hidden Forces That Drive You. In this illuminating episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon speaks with Robert about the influence of the shadow side of the psyche—especially Robert’s own encounters with it. Robert describes his experiences as the leader of a psychospiritual community that gradually transformed into a cult, including the near-death experience that forced him to confront the reality of his actions and change his life. Tami and Robert also talk about the powerful influence of shame, as well as the important differences between anger and aggression. Finally, they discuss the desire to place spiritual guides on pedestals and what we can do to address the difficult aspects of student-teacher relationships. (63 minutes)

Tami’s Takeaway: One of the ways that Robert Augustus Masters describes our personal shadow is that it contains experiences of wounding and early conditioning that we have yet to face. How do we know what we haven’t yet faced? Robert teaches that one of the best ways we can start to identify our shadow is to pay careful attention to moments of reactivity (we all know what those feel like) and then ask, “How old do I feel in this moment?” By entering the pain of these early disowned experiences, we start the hard task that Robert calls “illuminating the shadow,” a great life work that is endlessly deep and endlessly liberating.

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Try These Mindfulness Exercises To Ground Yourself

Mindfulness is an ancient, deeply personal practice that invites you into the present moment with compassion and awareness. And yet, for many of us, simply “being present” can feel elusive. We’re managing careers, relationships, health, and the constant pull of digital life. It’s no wonder anxiety and stress have become everyday companions. Through regular, intentional practices, we begin to notice the quiet steadiness underneath the noise. That’s where grounding lives.

For over 40 years, Sounds True has been a trusted leader in spiritual education and personal transformation, sharing the wisdom of teachers like Eckhart Tolle, Pema Chödrön, Tara Brach, and many others. As the world’s largest “living library” of transformational teachings, we’ve helped millions of people reconnect with presence, purpose, and their inner wisdom through unscripted, heart-centered resources.

In this piece, we’ll explore a series of mindfulness exercises to support your return to presence, whether you’re seeking mindfulness exercises for anxiety, tools for teens and adults, or daily mindfulness exercises for stress relief. You’ll also find soulful practices like inner rhythm meditations woven throughout to help you tune into your natural flow.

Key Takeaways:

  • Learn Audience-Specific Practices: This article offers tailored mindfulness exercises for anxiety, adults, teens, and daily stress relief.
  • Find Practical and Accessible Tools: Readers will find easy-to-implement, non-intimidating exercises they can begin using right away.
  • Integrating These Exercises into Daily Life: Meditation exercises encourage integrating mindfulness into ordinary activities for long-term emotional grounding and resilience.

Expand Your Consciousness With Sounds True.

Simple Mindfulness Exercises To Bring You Back To Center

Even the busiest mind can come back to stillness with a few moments of intention. These foundational mindfulness exercises are designed to be accessible, grounding, and easy to integrate into daily life.

Breathe For One Minute

This micro-practice is a gentle reminder that your breath is always available as an anchor. Set a timer for just 60 seconds. Sit or stand comfortably. Close your eyes if you’d like. Bring all of your awareness to the sensation of breathing, how the air enters and leaves your body, and how your chest rises and falls. Don’t change anything. Just notice. One minute of conscious breathing can create space between stimulus and response, making it a beautiful starting point for mindfulness exercises for anxiety or moments of stress.

Ground Through The Five Senses

When your thoughts are racing or your emotions feel overwhelming, coming back to your senses, literally, can reset your nervous system. To practice this, look around and quietly name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This kind of sensory awareness anchors your attention in the here and now, making it one of the most reliable mindfulness exercises for stress relief.

Notice Without Fixing

Mindfulness isn’t about making anything go away. It’s about seeing clearly. Try sitting in silence for a few minutes, simply noticing your thoughts, sensations, and emotions without trying to change or solve them. Let everything be as it is. This witnessing awareness is central to many mindfulness exercises for adults, a reminder that your worth isn’t based on productivity, performance, or emotional “control.” Instead, it’s grounded in the simple act of being present.

Mindfulness Exercises For Anxiety And Overwhelm

Anxiety often pulls us into the future, into what-ifs, worst-case scenarios, and mental loops that feel impossible to exit. Mindfulness brings us back to now. These exercises aren’t about eliminating anxiety, but about meeting it with gentleness, spaciousness, and embodied awareness.

Anchor To The Present With Touch

When anxiety feels like it’s spiraling, physical touch can be incredibly grounding. Place one hand on your chest and one on your belly. Feel the rise and fall of your breath beneath your hands. You don’t need to breathe in any special way, just notice the contact. This creates a direct, calming feedback loop that reminds the body it’s safe to soften. Practices like this are especially helpful when exploring mindfulness exercises for anxiety that are simple and body-centered.

Name What’s True In This Moment

A powerful way to interrupt anxious thoughts is to name what is real right now. Quietly say to yourself: “Right now, I am sitting on a chair. My feet are on the floor. I am breathing. I am safe.” You can add more statements based on your environment or sensations. This kind of mindful self-talk offers the brain a stable narrative to hold onto when anxiety is trying to pull you elsewhere. It’s a core part of how many people approach mindfulness exercises for stress relief as well.

Return To Ritual

When anxiety is chronic or persistent, creating small, daily routines can provide a sense of continuity. This might be lighting a candle before meditation, washing your hands slowly and with full attention, or taking a short mindful walk at the same time each day. These are quiet acts of devotion that bring structure to emotional chaos. For many adults, integrating mindfulness exercises helps create a sense of calm and inner order.

For a deeper experience of this rhythm-based approach, practices like inner rhythm meditations can support a more attuned, embodied return to presence.

Awaken Your Inner Healing Power With Sound True.

How Adults Can Use Mindfulness To Reconnect

Adulthood often brings a gradual disconnection from inner life. The constant push to do more, fix more, and be more can drown out the quiet voice within. Mindfulness gives adults a way to return, to presence, to embodiment, and to what matters most. It’s less about adding something new and more about softening into what’s already here.

Practices like breath tracking, gentle movement, or body scanning help rebuild that inner relationship. These mindfulness exercises for adults aren’t about achieving calm; they’re about creating space for honesty and self-awareness. Even simple routines like morning stillness or mindful transitions between tasks can foster deep reconnection.

Supporting Teens With Mindfulness Tools

Teenagers today are navigating an overwhelming mix of stimulation, pressure, and emotional intensity, often without the tools to process it all. Mindfulness can offer teens a way to slow down, feel what they’re feeling, and build emotional resilience from the inside out.

Unlike adults, teens often benefit from shorter, more tactile practices that meet them where they are. Movement-based mindfulness, breath-focused exercises, or even mindful listening with music can help create moments of pause without feeling forced or overly formal. These mindfulness exercises for teens aren’t about “fixing” behavior, but rather they’re about helping young people relate to themselves and their experiences with more kindness and awareness.

Meditation can also be incredibly empowering for teens to choose their own practice. Whether it’s a brief body scan before school or a silent check-in before sleep, creating space for autonomy makes mindfulness feel like a supportive resource rather than another rule to follow. Integrating accessible resources like inner rhythm meditations can also help teens begin to understand their emotional patterns and physical rhythms in a more grounded, compassionate way.

Daily Mindfulness Exercises for Stress Relief

Stress thrives on momentum. It builds, layer by layer, until we’re no longer responding to life; we’re reacting to it. Mindfulness breaks that cycle. Through small, intentional practices, we create pockets of stillness that allow the nervous system to reset and the body to soften.

Daily mindfulness exercises for stress relief don’t need to be elaborate. A few minutes of conscious breathing before checking your phone, taking a mindful walk after lunch, or simply pausing to feel your feet on the floor between meetings can shift your entire internal state. These moments act like pressure valves, gently releasing stored tension before it accumulates.

Repetition is key. The more frequently you return to yourself, the more familiar that calm becomes. Over time, the body begins to recognize presence as its home base, not stress. For those who feel especially drained or dysregulated, incorporating inner rhythm meditations can help guide you back to your body’s natural flow and restore balance from within.

Whether you’re navigating a high-stress job or simply feeling emotionally stretched, these simple yet consistent practices can anchor you in a steadier way of being and offer a meaningful alternative to burnout.

Explore Teachings From World-Renowned Psychologists And Researchers On Trauma, Mindfulness, Resilience, And Cognitive Growth.

Final Thoughts

More than something to master, mindfulness is something you remember as time goes on. A gentle return, over and over again, to the breath, the body, and the moment you’re living right now. These practices don’t promise a life free from stress or anxiety. Instead, they offer a way to meet life with more presence, compassion, and steadiness.

Whether you’re exploring mindfulness exercises for anxiety, integrating mindfulness into adult life, supporting a teen, or simply seeking stress relief, the power lies in consistency. Even the smallest pause, repeated with care, can rewire your relationship to the world around you, and within you. Above all, mindfulness is not a task to accomplish but rather it’s a path to walk, one breath at a time. Every time you return, you deepen your connection to yourself, and that is where healing begins.

Read More:

Frequently Asked Questions About Mindfulness Exercises

What are the core components of a mindfulness exercise?

A mindfulness exercise typically includes intention, focused attention (often on the breath, body, or senses), non-judgmental awareness, and a return to the present moment. These elements work together to train the mind in presence and compassion.

How long should I practice mindfulness each day?

Even 5–10 minutes daily can be effective. The key is consistency. Start small and gradually extend the time as it feels natural. Mindfulness is about presence, not perfection.

Are mindfulness exercises religious?

No. While mindfulness has roots in contemplative traditions like Buddhism, modern mindfulness practices are secular and adaptable to all belief systems.

Can mindfulness exercises help improve sleep?

Yes, practicing mindfulness before bed can help calm racing thoughts, ease physical tension, and prepare the nervous system for restful sleep.

Is it normal to feel distracted during mindfulness practice?

Absolutely. Distraction is part of the process. The goal isn’t to stop thoughts, but to notice when the mind wanders and gently bring it back to your point of focus.

How do I know if mindfulness is working?

Results are often subtle at first, like feeling slightly calmer, more aware, or less reactive. Over time, many notice improved emotional regulation and clarity.

Can children benefit from mindfulness exercises too?

Yes, children can benefit greatly from age-appropriate mindfulness tools, as these help them recognize emotions, improve focus, and develop emotional resilience early on.

What’s the difference between meditation and mindfulness?

Mindfulness is a way of being present in daily life, while meditation is a formal practice that often cultivates mindfulness. You can practice mindfulness without meditating.

Do I need to sit still to practice mindfulness?

Not at all. Walking, stretching, eating, and even washing dishes can all become mindfulness exercises when done with full attention and presence.

Can mindfulness help with physical pain?

Yes, mindfulness can change your relationship to pain by reducing resistance, softening tension, and increasing awareness without judgment. It doesn’t eliminate pain, but can make it more manageable.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator's Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.

[ENCORE EPISODE] Jon Kabat-Zinn: Befriending Pain

**SPECIAL ENCORE PRESENTATION**

Current statistics tell us that 20% of the US population has some form of chronic pain, defined as severe discomfort that has continued for six months or more. That’s more than 50 million people. Jon Kabat-Zinn has received international acclaim for his leading work in bringing the life-changing practices of meditation and mindfulness into the mainstream of medicine and society. In this inspiring podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Jon about his empowering new book, Mindfulness Meditation for Pain Relief, and how we can greatly improve our lives (and our entire world) by reframing the way we relate to our thoughts, our minds, and the sensations of our bodies.

Listen in as they discuss the epidemic of chronic pain and the power of mindfulness to ease suffering of all kinds, the myth of the “good meditator,” the body as the starting point for practice, exploring your “emotionally freighted thoughts,” our longing to be who we really are, working with the mind and learning to inhabit a space of embodied awareness, the refuge that is meditation practice, letting go of our stories, befriending the sensory field of what we call pain, the miracle of life on Earth, the Buddha’s teaching on mindfulness as the direct path to liberation, surfing the waves of your own experience, unity within diversity and the arising of compassion, focusing on what’s right instead of what’s wrong, how we are all on a growth curve on life’s journey, and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Listeners of Insights At The Edge get 10% off their first month at

www.betterhelp.com/soundstrue

What Is Guided Meditation? A Beginner’s Path to ...

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