Mark Bertin: How Children Thrive and the Developmental Path of Executive Function

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April 24, 2018

Mark Bertin: How Children Thrive and the Developmental Path of Executive Function

Mark Bertin April 24, 2018

Dr. Mark Bertin is a pediatrician, mindfulness teacher, and the author of regular articles for Mindful.org, Huffpost, and Psychology Today. With Sounds True, he has published How Children Thrive: The Practical Science of Raising Independent, Resilient, and Happy Kids. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Mark discuss his research on executive functioning—those mental processes that allow us to organize and responsibly manage our immediate environment—and how this develops in children. Drawing from his extensive work, Mark explains the healthy stages of executive function development and why a supportive, open-minded, and fun-promoting environment is what kids actually need to thrive. They talk about Mark’s previous work with childhood ADHD and how it led to his current focus, as well as why attention disorders can be interpreted as delays in executive function development. Finally, Mark and Tami speak on setting boundaries around technology use and how introducing mindfulness practices early in childhood leads to healthier, happier lives down the road. (64 minutes)

Mark Bertin, MD, is a developmental pediatrician and author. His previous books, Mindful Parenting for ADHD and The Family ADHD Solution, integrate mindfulness with other evidence-based ADHD care. He is also a contributing author for the book Teaching Mindfulness Skills to Kids and Teens. Dr. Bertin is a faculty member at New York Medical College and the Windward Teacher Training Institute, and is on the advisory boards for the nonprofit organizations Common Sense Media and Reach Out and Read. His blog is available through HuffPost, Mindful magazine, Mindful.org, and Psychology Today. For more information, please visit his website at developmentaldoctor.com.

Author photo © Stephanie Diani

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Also By Author

4 Ways to Value and Build More Joy Into This Holiday S...

The holiday season sometimes feel like brief moments of joy thrown together with an awful lot of unsettled intensity. Attending to those easier times doesn’t mean we should ignore the unpleasant, but we can aim to not get so caught up in it. It is often expectations, anxieties, and perfectionism that amp up our holiday experience. Focusing on what we value and giving those times our most direct attention, we end up with a happier and more restorative holiday season.

 

Give happier moments your full attention, as you would a meditation

Whenever you catch yourself distracted from a moment of ease, come back. That could be through spending a few minutes alone, or with a favorite person or pet. It could mean taking in a party while the room feels full of connection and excitement. Or savoring a favorite food. Notice when you’re distracted by future planning, problem solving, or past conflicts, and in an unforced way, immerse yourself in a joyful moment.

Let go of expectations and comparison

Don’t ‘should’ on your holidays by thinking they should be better or resemble that family’s holidays or resemble holidays from ten years ago. These holidays will never, by definition, be the same as any other. If something truly has you down, even that gets complicated by ‘should’—like thinking you should be joyful when you’re not. Ever find yourself doing something because you should, instead of wanting or needing to? Whenever you notice ‘should-ing,’ see if you can note the thoughts and come back to whatever you feel best.

Let go of perfection

Check in with what you value and want to give to others. Ease, connection, what most comes to mind? Let go of stories about what must unfold in some precise way to meet your holiday standard. Wishes are one thing (I hope we’re all happy and healthy), perfection is unlikely (everyone better get along this year for once).

Sustain yourself

Let go, when you choose (and without hassling yourself), of how you typically live while keeping up with whatever keeps you strong. How little sleep and exercise are okay before you implode emotionally? How much indulging before you feel miserable the next day and maybe one after that? How much stress relates to getting physically run down? And then, always remember that practicing gratitude and giving to others may be one of the most valuable, sustaining choices we have. Happy holidays!

 

Mark Bertin is a pediatrician, author, professor, and mindfulness teacher specializing in neurodevelopmental behavioral pediatrics. He is the author of How Children Thrive: The Practical Science of Raising Independent, Resilient, and Happy Kids, a regular contributor to Mindful.org, HuffPost, and Psychology Today. Dr. Bertin resides in Pleasantville, New York. For more, visit developmentaldoctor.com.

 

The community here at Sounds True wishes you a lovely holiday season! We are happy to collaborate with some of our Sounds True authors to offer you wisdom and practices as we move into this time together; please enjoy this blog series for your holiday season. 

To help encourage you and your loved ones to explore new possibilities this holiday season, we’re offering 40% off nearly all of our programs, books, and courses sitewide. May you find the wisdom to light your way. 

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Mindful Kids in Context

 

Mindful eating, mindful burgers, mindful sex . . . pretty much everything is mindful lately. Paying attention has value, but what’s the goal of all that mindfulness?

Defining mindfulness exactly is like trying to define psychology or exercise in one line; you can do it, but it never quite captures everything. To summarize, mindfulness means aiming to be more aware of our immediate experience, with less reactive habit. Even that language may feel abstract to the average parent or child trying to find some peace and happiness. More than any single definition, what matters most is that there’s an intention. We spend an awful lot of our lives reacting to things we like or dislike in ways that aren’t always useful. When we break patterns and handle the uncertainty of life more easily, that’s beneficial. However you define it, mindfulness means living with less mindless habit and more ability to manage the fact that life is awfully hard sometimes.

So what does mindfulness with kids mean? Another way of framing mindfulness is as a group of mental traits. It’s not that anything specifically gets fixed by a practice of mindfulness; it’s guiding children toward long-term skills that make life easier. We teach children to become more attentive, less reactive, more compassionate, and resilient. From that perspective, mindfulness is a way to build life management abilities, but far from the only one. We offer children tools to handle the challenging road ahead through any means that fit.

When we say that mindfulness means “paying attention to what we’re doing,” we transfer this to our children by paying more attention to them when we’re together. “Staying calm under pressure” means taking a few breaths and not blowing a gasket when homework falls apart. When we say to treat others with compassion, that starts with how we speak to the frazzled guy at the airport dealing with our flight cancellation. Acknowledging honestly and openly that no one is perfect, we also recognize that we won’t stick to our own intentions all the time. We make mistakes and learn from them and keep going. Drawing our children into that part of life teaches them something too.

When it comes to teaching mindfulness, focus on the skills you want your children to develop. That matters more than whether they commit to a “mindfulness practice.” We build resilience by developing EF (Executive Function) and attention, emotional awareness, self-confidence, self-compassion, positive relationships, and all the rest that comes from being raised in a mindful, aware household. That doesn’t mean specifically meditating, but it does mean emphasizing a balanced lifestyle.

Mindfulness implies living with clarity in a certain way. We guide kids to pay attention every way we can — by taking moments to pause and look at a sea shell or by prioritizing activities that build attention (like reading, chess, and board games) over those that disrupt attention (excessive screen time). We discuss emotions and describe our own emotions. We live compassionately, read books that reflect other people’s perspectives, and generally immerse kids in compassion, while gradually considering if they’re ready for a compassion-based mindfulness practice.

Mindfulness is a tool kit for a different way of living, one that provides kids skills to manage life on their own one day. The good news is, kids don’t even have to practice it themselves to get there. They learn from watching us and from the overall way they live themselves. Of course, they eventually can learn from their own practice of mindfulness too. As you practice yourself, you’ll know exactly how to encourage your children to join you (links to books supporting mindfulness in kids can be found at howchildrenthrive.com). But it’s the big picture of how they are raised that counts most.

Consider This:

Imagine yourself from your child’s point of view. How would your child describe you to a friend? What’s fun and easy about you, what are your strengths, and what areas might you want to change?

 

Excerpted from How Children Thrive: The Practical Science of Raising Independent, Resilient, and Happy Kids.

 

 

Mark Bertin, MD, is a bestselling author who specializes in integrating mindfulness with other evidence-based neurodevelopmental care. His previous books include Mindful Parenting for ADHD and The Family ADHD Solution.

 

 

Buy your copy of How Children Thrive at your favorite bookseller!

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Mark Bertin: How Children Thrive and the Developmental...

Dr. Mark Bertin is a pediatrician, mindfulness teacher, and the author of regular articles for Mindful.org, Huffpost, and Psychology Today. With Sounds True, he has published How Children Thrive: The Practical Science of Raising Independent, Resilient, and Happy Kids. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Mark discuss his research on executive functioning—those mental processes that allow us to organize and responsibly manage our immediate environment—and how this develops in children. Drawing from his extensive work, Mark explains the healthy stages of executive function development and why a supportive, open-minded, and fun-promoting environment is what kids actually need to thrive. They talk about Mark’s previous work with childhood ADHD and how it led to his current focus, as well as why attention disorders can be interpreted as delays in executive function development. Finally, Mark and Tami speak on setting boundaries around technology use and how introducing mindfulness practices early in childhood leads to healthier, happier lives down the road. (64 minutes)

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Try These Mindfulness Exercises To Ground Yourself

Mindfulness is an ancient, deeply personal practice that invites you into the present moment with compassion and awareness. And yet, for many of us, simply “being present” can feel elusive. We’re managing careers, relationships, health, and the constant pull of digital life. It’s no wonder anxiety and stress have become everyday companions. Through regular, intentional practices, we begin to notice the quiet steadiness underneath the noise. That’s where grounding lives.

For over 40 years, Sounds True has been a trusted leader in spiritual education and personal transformation, sharing the wisdom of teachers like Eckhart Tolle, Pema Chödrön, Tara Brach, and many others. As the world’s largest “living library” of transformational teachings, we’ve helped millions of people reconnect with presence, purpose, and their inner wisdom through unscripted, heart-centered resources.

In this piece, we’ll explore a series of mindfulness exercises to support your return to presence, whether you’re seeking mindfulness exercises for anxiety, tools for teens and adults, or daily mindfulness exercises for stress relief. You’ll also find soulful practices like inner rhythm meditations woven throughout to help you tune into your natural flow.

Key Takeaways:

  • Learn Audience-Specific Practices: This article offers tailored mindfulness exercises for anxiety, adults, teens, and daily stress relief.
  • Find Practical and Accessible Tools: Readers will find easy-to-implement, non-intimidating exercises they can begin using right away.
  • Integrating These Exercises into Daily Life: Meditation exercises encourage integrating mindfulness into ordinary activities for long-term emotional grounding and resilience.

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Simple Mindfulness Exercises To Bring You Back To Center

Even the busiest mind can come back to stillness with a few moments of intention. These foundational mindfulness exercises are designed to be accessible, grounding, and easy to integrate into daily life.

Breathe For One Minute

This micro-practice is a gentle reminder that your breath is always available as an anchor. Set a timer for just 60 seconds. Sit or stand comfortably. Close your eyes if you’d like. Bring all of your awareness to the sensation of breathing, how the air enters and leaves your body, and how your chest rises and falls. Don’t change anything. Just notice. One minute of conscious breathing can create space between stimulus and response, making it a beautiful starting point for mindfulness exercises for anxiety or moments of stress.

Ground Through The Five Senses

When your thoughts are racing or your emotions feel overwhelming, coming back to your senses, literally, can reset your nervous system. To practice this, look around and quietly name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This kind of sensory awareness anchors your attention in the here and now, making it one of the most reliable mindfulness exercises for stress relief.

Notice Without Fixing

Mindfulness isn’t about making anything go away. It’s about seeing clearly. Try sitting in silence for a few minutes, simply noticing your thoughts, sensations, and emotions without trying to change or solve them. Let everything be as it is. This witnessing awareness is central to many mindfulness exercises for adults, a reminder that your worth isn’t based on productivity, performance, or emotional “control.” Instead, it’s grounded in the simple act of being present.

Mindfulness Exercises For Anxiety And Overwhelm

Anxiety often pulls us into the future, into what-ifs, worst-case scenarios, and mental loops that feel impossible to exit. Mindfulness brings us back to now. These exercises aren’t about eliminating anxiety, but about meeting it with gentleness, spaciousness, and embodied awareness.

Anchor To The Present With Touch

When anxiety feels like it’s spiraling, physical touch can be incredibly grounding. Place one hand on your chest and one on your belly. Feel the rise and fall of your breath beneath your hands. You don’t need to breathe in any special way, just notice the contact. This creates a direct, calming feedback loop that reminds the body it’s safe to soften. Practices like this are especially helpful when exploring mindfulness exercises for anxiety that are simple and body-centered.

Name What’s True In This Moment

A powerful way to interrupt anxious thoughts is to name what is real right now. Quietly say to yourself: “Right now, I am sitting on a chair. My feet are on the floor. I am breathing. I am safe.” You can add more statements based on your environment or sensations. This kind of mindful self-talk offers the brain a stable narrative to hold onto when anxiety is trying to pull you elsewhere. It’s a core part of how many people approach mindfulness exercises for stress relief as well.

Return To Ritual

When anxiety is chronic or persistent, creating small, daily routines can provide a sense of continuity. This might be lighting a candle before meditation, washing your hands slowly and with full attention, or taking a short mindful walk at the same time each day. These are quiet acts of devotion that bring structure to emotional chaos. For many adults, integrating mindfulness exercises helps create a sense of calm and inner order.

For a deeper experience of this rhythm-based approach, practices like inner rhythm meditations can support a more attuned, embodied return to presence.

Awaken Your Inner Healing Power With Sound True.

How Adults Can Use Mindfulness To Reconnect

Adulthood often brings a gradual disconnection from inner life. The constant push to do more, fix more, and be more can drown out the quiet voice within. Mindfulness gives adults a way to return, to presence, to embodiment, and to what matters most. It’s less about adding something new and more about softening into what’s already here.

Practices like breath tracking, gentle movement, or body scanning help rebuild that inner relationship. These mindfulness exercises for adults aren’t about achieving calm; they’re about creating space for honesty and self-awareness. Even simple routines like morning stillness or mindful transitions between tasks can foster deep reconnection.

Supporting Teens With Mindfulness Tools

Teenagers today are navigating an overwhelming mix of stimulation, pressure, and emotional intensity, often without the tools to process it all. Mindfulness can offer teens a way to slow down, feel what they’re feeling, and build emotional resilience from the inside out.

Unlike adults, teens often benefit from shorter, more tactile practices that meet them where they are. Movement-based mindfulness, breath-focused exercises, or even mindful listening with music can help create moments of pause without feeling forced or overly formal. These mindfulness exercises for teens aren’t about “fixing” behavior, but rather they’re about helping young people relate to themselves and their experiences with more kindness and awareness.

Meditation can also be incredibly empowering for teens to choose their own practice. Whether it’s a brief body scan before school or a silent check-in before sleep, creating space for autonomy makes mindfulness feel like a supportive resource rather than another rule to follow. Integrating accessible resources like inner rhythm meditations can also help teens begin to understand their emotional patterns and physical rhythms in a more grounded, compassionate way.

Daily Mindfulness Exercises for Stress Relief

Stress thrives on momentum. It builds, layer by layer, until we’re no longer responding to life; we’re reacting to it. Mindfulness breaks that cycle. Through small, intentional practices, we create pockets of stillness that allow the nervous system to reset and the body to soften.

Daily mindfulness exercises for stress relief don’t need to be elaborate. A few minutes of conscious breathing before checking your phone, taking a mindful walk after lunch, or simply pausing to feel your feet on the floor between meetings can shift your entire internal state. These moments act like pressure valves, gently releasing stored tension before it accumulates.

Repetition is key. The more frequently you return to yourself, the more familiar that calm becomes. Over time, the body begins to recognize presence as its home base, not stress. For those who feel especially drained or dysregulated, incorporating inner rhythm meditations can help guide you back to your body’s natural flow and restore balance from within.

Whether you’re navigating a high-stress job or simply feeling emotionally stretched, these simple yet consistent practices can anchor you in a steadier way of being and offer a meaningful alternative to burnout.

Explore Teachings From World-Renowned Psychologists And Researchers On Trauma, Mindfulness, Resilience, And Cognitive Growth.

Final Thoughts

More than something to master, mindfulness is something you remember as time goes on. A gentle return, over and over again, to the breath, the body, and the moment you’re living right now. These practices don’t promise a life free from stress or anxiety. Instead, they offer a way to meet life with more presence, compassion, and steadiness.

Whether you’re exploring mindfulness exercises for anxiety, integrating mindfulness into adult life, supporting a teen, or simply seeking stress relief, the power lies in consistency. Even the smallest pause, repeated with care, can rewire your relationship to the world around you, and within you. Above all, mindfulness is not a task to accomplish but rather it’s a path to walk, one breath at a time. Every time you return, you deepen your connection to yourself, and that is where healing begins.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Mindfulness Exercises

What are the core components of a mindfulness exercise?

A mindfulness exercise typically includes intention, focused attention (often on the breath, body, or senses), non-judgmental awareness, and a return to the present moment. These elements work together to train the mind in presence and compassion.

How long should I practice mindfulness each day?

Even 5–10 minutes daily can be effective. The key is consistency. Start small and gradually extend the time as it feels natural. Mindfulness is about presence, not perfection.

Are mindfulness exercises religious?

No. While mindfulness has roots in contemplative traditions like Buddhism, modern mindfulness practices are secular and adaptable to all belief systems.

Can mindfulness exercises help improve sleep?

Yes, practicing mindfulness before bed can help calm racing thoughts, ease physical tension, and prepare the nervous system for restful sleep.

Is it normal to feel distracted during mindfulness practice?

Absolutely. Distraction is part of the process. The goal isn’t to stop thoughts, but to notice when the mind wanders and gently bring it back to your point of focus.

How do I know if mindfulness is working?

Results are often subtle at first, like feeling slightly calmer, more aware, or less reactive. Over time, many notice improved emotional regulation and clarity.

Can children benefit from mindfulness exercises too?

Yes, children can benefit greatly from age-appropriate mindfulness tools, as these help them recognize emotions, improve focus, and develop emotional resilience early on.

What’s the difference between meditation and mindfulness?

Mindfulness is a way of being present in daily life, while meditation is a formal practice that often cultivates mindfulness. You can practice mindfulness without meditating.

Do I need to sit still to practice mindfulness?

Not at all. Walking, stretching, eating, and even washing dishes can all become mindfulness exercises when done with full attention and presence.

Can mindfulness help with physical pain?

Yes, mindfulness can change your relationship to pain by reducing resistance, softening tension, and increasing awareness without judgment. It doesn’t eliminate pain, but can make it more manageable.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator's Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.

[ENCORE EPISODE] Jon Kabat-Zinn: Befriending Pain

**SPECIAL ENCORE PRESENTATION**

Current statistics tell us that 20% of the US population has some form of chronic pain, defined as severe discomfort that has continued for six months or more. That’s more than 50 million people. Jon Kabat-Zinn has received international acclaim for his leading work in bringing the life-changing practices of meditation and mindfulness into the mainstream of medicine and society. In this inspiring podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Jon about his empowering new book, Mindfulness Meditation for Pain Relief, and how we can greatly improve our lives (and our entire world) by reframing the way we relate to our thoughts, our minds, and the sensations of our bodies.

Listen in as they discuss the epidemic of chronic pain and the power of mindfulness to ease suffering of all kinds, the myth of the “good meditator,” the body as the starting point for practice, exploring your “emotionally freighted thoughts,” our longing to be who we really are, working with the mind and learning to inhabit a space of embodied awareness, the refuge that is meditation practice, letting go of our stories, befriending the sensory field of what we call pain, the miracle of life on Earth, the Buddha’s teaching on mindfulness as the direct path to liberation, surfing the waves of your own experience, unity within diversity and the arising of compassion, focusing on what’s right instead of what’s wrong, how we are all on a growth curve on life’s journey, and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Listeners of Insights At The Edge get 10% off their first month at

www.betterhelp.com/soundstrue

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Explore mindfulness vs meditation and discover how each can uplift your mental health. Unravel the benefits, and start your transformative journey today!

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