The Awesome Human Project

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February 1, 2022

The Awesome Human Project

Nataly Kogan February 1, 2022

Nataly Kogan is an entrepreneur, speaker, and author on a mission to help people cultivate their “Awesome Human” skills by making simple, scientifically backed practices part of their daily lives. The author of the books Happier Now and The Awesome Human Project, she has appeared in hundreds of media outlets, including the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, TEDxBoston, SXSW, and the Harvard Women’s Leadership Conference. In this podcast, Sounds True founder Tami Simon speaks with Nataly about how we can live in a way that enables us to thrive while we give all of our gifts. They also discuss developing the five skills of emotional fitness; the practice of “struggle awareness” when faced with a challenge; overcoming the brain’s negativity bias, and the art of “courageously talking back to our brains” with kindness and compassion; the five traits of the Awesome Human; a leader as someone who positively impacts another person’s ability to flourish; sharing your emotional “whiteboard” to support the best possible interactions with others; the concept of “surface acting” at work and how it contributes to burnout; investing in a daily check-in with yourself; the power of self-compassion and self-acceptance; self-care as the skill of fueling your emotional, mental, and physical energy; and connecting to your “bigger why.”

Nataly Kogan is a best-selling author, keynote speaker, and entrepreneur whose superpower is activating people to grow into the thriving awesome humans they’re meant to become.

Nataly immigrated to the US as a refugee from the former Soviet Union when she was 13 years old. Starting her American life in the projects and on welfare, she went on to reach the highest levels of career success at McKinsey and Microsoft and as founder and executive at five tech companies.

But after suffering a debilitating burnout, Nataly reinvented how she lived and worked. She founded Happier Inc., whose gratitude sharing mobile app, courses, Happier @ Work and leadership programs have helped more than a million people lead more fulfilling lives.

She is an international keynote speaker and has appeared in hundreds of media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, Harvard Business Review, Forbes, and Time.

Nataly began painting when she turned 40 and is a self-taught abstract artist. She loves yellow, overuses the word “awesome”, and is the funniest person in her family. (Just ask her husband and daughter, her favorite awesome humans.)

For more, visit natalykogan.com.

Author photo © Jonathan Gershon Stark

Listen to Tami Simon's in-depth audio podcast interviews with Nataly Kogan:
The Awesome Human Project »

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Meet Your Host: Tami Simon

Founded Sounds True in 1985 as a multimedia publishing house with a mission to disseminate spiritual wisdom. She hosts a popular weekly podcast called Insights at the Edge, where she has interviewed many of today's leading teachers. Tami lives with her wife, Julie M. Kramer, and their two spoodles, Rasberry and Bula, in Boulder, Colorado.

Photo © Jason Elias

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Nataly Kogan: Living in a Friendly and Joy-Filled Univ...

What brings you your greatest joy? How do you access your inner “awesome”? Nataly Kogan has made it her life’s work to help people overcome burnout and break free from endless busyness. In this podcast, Tami Simon speaks with Nataly about her new book, The Awesome Human Journal, and the practical steps we can begin to take right now to shift out of self-defeating thought patterns (and their corresponding emotions), reclaim our energy, and share our gifts with the world. 

Tune in as Tami and Nataly discuss insights from neuroscience that everyone should know; the human brain’s negativity bias; creating a better relationship with your thoughts—a key to well-being and emotional fitness; the worst-case scenario exercise; finding certainty in uncertain times; working within your sphere of impact; cultivating agency; freedom from skepticism and mistrust; living an aligned life in a universe that is friendly; energetic self-care; breaking the habit of denying ourselves joy; changing our habitual frame of reference to something positive and supportive; and more.

Note: This episode originally aired on Sounds True One, where these special episodes of Insights at the Edge are available to watch live on video and with exclusive access to Q&As with our guests. Learn more at join.soundstrue.com.

The Awesome Human Project

Nataly Kogan is an entrepreneur, speaker, and author on a mission to help people cultivate their “Awesome Human” skills by making simple, scientifically backed practices part of their daily lives. The author of the books Happier Now and The Awesome Human Project, she has appeared in hundreds of media outlets, including the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, TEDxBoston, SXSW, and the Harvard Women’s Leadership Conference. In this podcast, Sounds True founder Tami Simon speaks with Nataly about how we can live in a way that enables us to thrive while we give all of our gifts. They also discuss developing the five skills of emotional fitness; the practice of “struggle awareness” when faced with a challenge; overcoming the brain’s negativity bias, and the art of “courageously talking back to our brains” with kindness and compassion; the five traits of the Awesome Human; a leader as someone who positively impacts another person’s ability to flourish; sharing your emotional “whiteboard” to support the best possible interactions with others; the concept of “surface acting” at work and how it contributes to burnout; investing in a daily check-in with yourself; the power of self-compassion and self-acceptance; self-care as the skill of fueling your emotional, mental, and physical energy; and connecting to your “bigger why.”

4 Ways to Practice Gratitude This Holiday Season

The holiday season can be hectic and overwhelming, with many mixed emotions, from excitement to stress. It’s the perfect time to commit to a daily practice of gratitude which will help you experience more moments of contentment and joy and give you resilience to handle the many challenges (including travel and stressful relatives). And when you share your gratitude with others, you help them feel seen, valued, elevated, and help yourself feel more closely connected to people in your life. Here are four ways to practice gratitude this holiday season. 

Say Thank You and Mean It

When you thank someone, be intentional about it and put your heart and appreciation into your words. Take a moment, pause, look them in the eye, smile, and say ‘Thank you’. If there is something specific you want to thank them for, do it, go the extra step, that’s awesome.

Daily Gratitude Bookends

Begin and end your day by writing down a few things you’re grateful for. Literally bookend your day with gratitude. If you’re not a journaling type, that’s fine—how about sharing what you’re grateful for with someone else, like a family member, friend, or co-worker—in-person or via text or email. You won’t just be practicing gratitude for yourself but inspiring them to do it also. Remember to be as specific as possible and don’t neglect really small moments.

Gratitude Zoom

If you’re feeling down or caught in a negativity spiral, pause and challenge yourself to find something you can appreciate within your experience, however small. For example, if you’re sad about being sick and missing out on what you would rather be doing, can you feel grateful that you have medicine or a comfortable place to recover or people around to help care for you?

Gratitude Antidote

When something stresses you out—too much traffic, an annoying colleague, etc.—use it as a reminder to practice gratitude. You don’t have to be grateful for whatever is stressing you out, but use it as a nudge to pause, take a breath, and think of something, however small, that you are grateful for in that moment. When you do this, you prevent your brain from going into a negativity spiral, where one annoying thought brings on another, and another, and another, until you have a really rough day.

 

Nataly Kogan is an author (Happier Now), speaker, and the founder of Happier. Her work has been featured in hundreds of media outlets, including the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, TEDx Boston, SXSW, and Dr Oz. Nataly lives with her husband and daughter in Boston. For more, visit happier.com.

 

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Feeding Your Demons: Lama Tsultrim Allione on Turning ...

Fear, self-doubt, and emotional pain have a way of showing up uninvited, and most of us spend enormous energy trying to push them away. What would shift for you if turning toward those experiences, with curiosity and care, became the most healing thing you could do? 

At Sounds True, we have spent four decades connecting people with teachers who ask exactly that kind of question. Our library of transformational teachings, digital courses, and programs exists to help you move through life’s harder moments with greater awareness and inner strength.

We will cover the feeding your demons practice, Lama Tsultrim Allione’s approach to turning towards difficulty, the ancient roots of Machig Labdron Chod and Tibetan shadow work, and how relating to demons as teachers can open a path toward lasting inner growth.

Key Takeaways:

  • Meet Fear with Compassion: The feeding your demons practice invites us to turn toward emotional pain with openness, creating a path toward genuine self-awareness and healing.
  • Ancient Roots, Modern Healing: Rooted in the Tibetan Buddhist lineage of Machig Labdrön, this practice draws from centuries of contemplative wisdom to help transform fear into freedom.
  • Demons Become Your Greatest Teachers: Lama Tsultrim Allione’s teachings reveal that our most difficult inner struggles often hold the most important lessons about where genuine growth is possible.

Discover how your mind really works

Lama Tsultrim Allione: Turning Towards Difficulty 

Lama Tsultrim Allione is a recognized Buddhist teacher, author, and the founder of Tara Mandala, a mountain retreat center dedicated to contemplative practice and spiritual study. She has spent decades teaching within the lineage of Machig Labdrön, the 11th-century Tibetan yogini who founded the Chöd tradition, and has brought her work on Dzogchen teachings to students around the world.

When we treat challenging emotions as teachers, space opens for greater awareness, resilience, and emotional freedom. Her teachings show that turning towards difficulty is one of the most courageous acts of self-care we can practice. Her work sits alongside that of many respected voices we are proud to carry, all of whom you can find on our All Teachers & Authors page.

What Is Feeding Your Demons and Why Do We Avoid What We Fear?

Most of us instinctively turn away from difficult emotions, painful memories, or persistent inner struggles. The practice of feeding your demons offers a different path. Meeting fear, anger, or shame with curiosity and compassion, and asking what those feelings truly need, can begin to shift even the most entrenched patterns.

Lama Tsultrim Allione developed a five-step process for working with disowned emotions without becoming pulled into spirals of negativity. Rooted in both shamanic and Buddhist traditions, this approach weaves ancient practices into a form that feels accessible to modern practitioners. 

Our Spirituality & Awakening collection brings together teachings like these, spanning presence, healing, and inner exploration for those ready to go deeper. Now, let’s see what makes this practice possible.

Map Your Inner Landscape

The practice teaches you to map your demons and recognize how they interconnect. A fear of failure, for example, often links to a deeper sense of unworthiness that surfaces across professional and personal life, creating patterns that repeat until they are met with awareness and care.

Tend, Don’t Fight

One of the practice’s most compelling insights is that tending to your demons can yield real physical results. Chronic tension, restless sleep, and emotional exhaustion often ease when we begin to meet what is present with openness. Practitioners describe a quality of release that resistance alone never creates.

A Gateway to Awakening 

Working with your demons can become a potent gateway to spiritual awakening. When we stop avoiding what frightens us, those very struggles often reveal where we are clinging, where healing is needed, and what genuine growth looks like in practice. These skills help subdue fear and embrace openness, laying the groundwork for deeper spiritual engagement.

Tibetan Shadow Work and Inner Growth 

Tibetan shadow work offers a compassionate framework for working with the parts of ourselves we often reject or ignore. When we meet uncomfortable thoughts with openness, we begin to recognize them as invitations for insight and transformation. The more willing we become to face these hidden aspects, the more inner balance we can cultivate.

The feeding your demons practice is rooted in the ancient tradition of Machig Labdron Chod, a Tibetan Buddhist lineage that teaches transformation through generosity and openness. Machig Labdrön’s teachings hold that we can learn to relate to suffering in a new way, meeting it with care. Symbolically offering nourishment to our fears softens habitual avoidance and creates conditions for lasting healing.

Alongside Chöd, other exercises within this tradition draw from both shamanic and Buddhist practice, including visualization techniques, body-centered awareness, and practices that help us move toward what we would avoid. 

Addressing our demons directly is one of the most powerful commitments we can make to personal growth and transformation. Our Subtle Energy collection supports this kind of inner work, bringing together teachings on energetic awareness for those ready to go deeper.

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Bringing the Feeding Your Demons Practice into Everyday Life

The principles behind this practice are available in ordinary moments, during daily challenges and quiet pauses alike. When stress surfaces in a difficult conversation, when anxiety arises before something uncertain, or when a familiar pattern pulls at you, meeting what is present with kindness and curiosity can create a real shift.

Start with Simple Awareness 

Begin by noticing when a difficult emotion arises, without immediately trying to resolve it. Naming what you are experiencing, whether fear, grief, or frustration, loosens its hold and creates just enough space to respond with care. This small pause can become one of the most transformative habits.

Work with a Structured Process

Returning to Lama Tsultrim Allione’s five-step approach during moments of emotional intensity gives the practice a clear container. Working with it consistently, even briefly, builds an inner capacity that makes responding to difficulty with compassion feel more natural. Pairing this with regular meditation can deepen the effects.

Engage with Teaching and Community

Connecting with teachers who share this path makes the practice feel less solitary. Many of our teachers share this kind of practical wisdom on the Insights at the Edge Podcast, where leading spiritual voices discuss awareness, compassion, and how to bring transformation into daily life.

Demons as teachers become most vivid when we commit to meeting them consistently, with the same warmth and curiosity we bring to any other form of inner work.

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Final Thoughts

The practice of feeding your demons reminds us that lasting transformation often begins by turning toward the parts of ourselves we would rather avoid. Through Lama Tsultrim Allione’s teachings, the wisdom of Machig Labdron Chod, and the tools of Tibetan shadow work, we can learn to meet fear with compassion and recognize demons as teachers. 

As that relationship shifts, more space opens for healing, self-awareness, and inner peace. We are here to walk alongside you in that journey, with teachings, digital courses, and a community that meets you wherever you are on the path. 

Frequently Asked Questions About Feeding Your Demons

What is the purpose of practicing how to feed your demons?

The purpose of feeding your demons is to change your relationship with fear, emotional pain, and inner conflict. Instead of trying to eliminate these experiences, the practice encourages understanding and compassion as a path toward healing.

Do I need to be Buddhist to practice “befriending my demons?”

No. Many people practice feeding their demons regardless of their religious or spiritual background. The method focuses on self-awareness and emotional healing, making it accessible to anyone interested in personal growth.

Can facing your fears head-on help with anxiety?

Many practitioners find the practice helpful for understanding anxious thoughts and emotional patterns. It is intended to complement personal growth and is not a substitute for professional mental health care.

Why are demons described as teachers?

The term “demons as teachers” reflects the idea that our greatest challenges often reveal important lessons about our fears, habits, and unmet emotional needs.

Is feeding your demons the same as shadow work?

They share similar intentions but differ in approach. Tibetan shadow work draws from Buddhist teachings and guided visualization, while other forms of shadow work may use psychological or therapeutic methods.

Can beginners learn how to face their demons through practice?

Yes. Beginners can start by learning the core principles through books, guided audio practices, workshops, or teachings from qualified instructors before developing a regular practice.

How often should I practice Lama Tsultrim Allione’s spiritual exercises?

There is no fixed schedule. Some people use the practice during periods of emotional difficulty, while others include it as part of their ongoing spiritual or mindfulness routine.

Michelle Cassandra Johnson is an author, activist, spiritual teacher, racial equity consultant, and intuitive healer. She is the author of six books, including Skill in Action and Finding Refuge. Amy Burtaine is a leadership coach and racial equity trainer. With Robin DiAngelo, she is the coauthor of The Facilitator's Guide for White Affinity Groups. For more, visit https://www.michellecjohnson.com/wisdom-of-the-hive.